


First Spouse

by LadyBardock



Series: Darkness [26]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Harem, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Slavery, F/M, Feeling Unwanted, M/M, Manipulation, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Palace, Rejection, Wealth, abolishment of slavery, change of roles, strong omega characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-13
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-01 14:54:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 29,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11488707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyBardock/pseuds/LadyBardock
Summary: Dain made a very difficult decision of marrying off his only omega child, just for his own good... Kili however strongly disagrees, he's a well educated omega with a strong character and will, and being a slave is not his idea for a good future. Finding himself in the house of his mate, unwanted and scolded he tries to assert his position as First Spouse. Fate and family might help him with that. Will he be able to keep his strong position when Thorin falls ill?





	1. Chapter 1

„Fuck, fuck, fuck…” Kili was pacing around his room furious.

“You knew this would come about.” Balin’s voice of reason did not reach him at all, the boy was still furious and willing to swear himself to hell.

“Damn that old bastard how dare he!” Kili hit the wall just to hurt his hand.

“You knew he would never let you...” Balin paused. “A life of an omega is that of servitude. Even the life of an omega from a family as rich as yours...”

“All I wanted was to go to school...” Kili’s answer transformed into hysteria. His eyes filled with tears and desperation.

“I taught you all I could... We both know your brain was made for finer things... but the reality is you were born an omega, and omegas...” Balin tried to plead.

“are born to serve.” Kili ended bitterly. “What do you think will happen to me?”

“I have no idea dear child...” Balin suddenly felt tears come to his eyes as well, he gently embraced the child he raised and taught as if he was his own child. “Some arranged bondings are happy... some mates give privileges and respect... maybe if your mate will be kind he might let you go to school...”

“We both know it will never happen...” Kili was bitter. “Most mates are horrible...”

“I’m sorry my boy...” Balin did not know what to say.

“It’s not your fault...” Kili tried to calm down and think logically.

“There is nothing you can do, but accept your fate, try to please your mate, try to...” Balin pleaded in a desperate voice, he knew Kili way too well. The determined spark in his eyes didn’t signal anything good.

\--------

Kili’s whole side hurt, but still he thought it was worth it. He should have taken the North Road instead of the South. He should have chosen a better time and place, but now it didn’t matter any more.

“You’re a disobedient brat!” His father’s voice was furious. Dain could be pleasing, if he wanted something, but when angry he was pure fury in its purest form.

“I asked only for one thing... and you just had to...” Kili was his father’s son.

“The role of the omega is to serve, and as much as I love you, you’re my only child.” Dain was bitter. “As an omega you cannot take over neither the land nor the family fortune, I’m doing you a favour!”

“A favour my ass! I don’t want to be sold like cattle!” Kili yelled at him.

“I chose a good family, and someone decent! I chose the perfect bonding both for you and for our family!” Dain insisted. “And you just had to run away and try some crazy scheme!”

“I don’t want to be a slave!” Kili whined.

“You’re going to bond! I’m not selling you to slavery!” Dain was now even more furious.

“Bonding is the same!” Kili insisted.

“No, it’s not!” Dain insisted. “You will be respected, you will be treated well. I made sure of that.”

“And he will take my money... or should I say, he will take your money!” Kili pointed out smartly.

“No, he won’t. I dictated the bonding conditions.” Dain looked at him sternly. “I’m not stupid, you know...”

“So what are the conditions?” Kili asked curiously.

“Your children will inherit my money, not your spouse.” Dain clarified. “You are not to be harmed in any way, and I gave you all the protection I could.”

“We both know it won’t matter...” Kili looked down depressed.

“I asked Gandalf to supervise the contract.” Dain admitted. “He will periodically make sure you are fine, and any complaint from you... you will be transferred to his care, and your children will inherit my fortune.”

“What?” Kili’s eyes went wide. It was unheard of, an omega was his mate’s property, but this would mean...

“I did my best to protect you.” Dain began coughing loudly. “I don’t have much time left.”

“Did you see the medic?” Kili was suddenly extremely worried about his only living parent.

“I got a few weeks at best... That last wound in battle opened an old wound in my lungs...” Dain looked away with pain. “We need the ceremony done as soon as possible, otherwise...”

“For fuck’s sake!” Kili kicked the wall.

“I’m doing this because I love you... not because I want to hurt you.” Dain had tears in his eyes. “This is my last chance to give you a safe and good life, and to make sure...”

“Will you promise not to run away?” Dain begged.

“Yes, father...” Kili looked down in defeat.

\-------

The day of the bonding came way too fast for Kili’s taste, but he chocked it down. He was dressed, he had the best make up, and he was firmly instructed what to do. It was a traditional ceremony, and meeting his mate for the first time shook Kili.

He was... stunningly handsome. Beautiful golden curly hair, deep blue eyes and a stunning strong built. Even in his wildest dreams Kili did not envision such a perfect alpha to be his mate... They didn’t speak much during the ceremony, the blond gently held his arm as the minister conducted the legal agreement between both families. Kili vaguely could recall his father’s violent coughing in the distance and he was suddenly conscious of the reality. He was now... property. And only hope that this alpha was kind was keeping him from protesting.

He was handed a glass of wine, but he refused to drink. Alcohol was a really bad idea, and he wanted to be aware of everything around him. The alpha for the first time did not seem nice at all. He made a scowl and slammed the glass against the table, drawing a lot of attention to them.

He didn’t say anything, but those blue eyes suddenly seemed liked a raging storm, and Kili felt a shiver run down his back. But as fear awoke in his heart, so did fury. He wasn’t just a slave. He was an omega from one of the richest families in the world, the heir to the IronHills. And the contract just signed was designed to give him at least some recognition and respect.

He didn’t avoid the alpha’s eyes, and he stood his ground, just to earn a scowl.

The alpha left him at the table without a word, and Kili just sat there stunned and marooned. There was a lot of fancy food around him, but everything was making him nauseous.

“Try to be a good omega...” Dain’s last words were full of pleading.

“I’m not sure I’m a good omega father...” Kili whispered so that no one could hear.

“I pray your brain wins over your stubbornness...” Dain kissed his cheek gently trying to hide from everyone his tears. “Be smart... don’t fight with him.”

“I’m sorry to be such a disappointment father...” Kili looked down depressed.

“You never were a disappointment.” Dain mumbled. “I just pray that you had been born in a world that didn’t scorn omegas so much... had you been born an alpha... everything would have been different.”

Kili felt tears come to his eyes, but he quickly wiped them.

“Be strong and smart at the same time.” Dain said his last words before parting. “I love you.”

“I love you too father....” Kili suddenly was his with the thought that it was probably one of their last meetings ever, and now...

Soon people were leaving, and the servants began cleaning the expensive hall, but Kili had no idea what to do. It wasn’t his home, he didn’t know the building, and he didn’t know where to go. He was tired and sleepy, but he didn’t even know where he would sleep. The feeling of being scorned was setting in. The alpha just left him, and walked away to have fun, talk with people and now he was nowhere to be seen.

“Sir, could you please go to your room so we could clean up the table?” A very thin looking servant asked him pleadingly.

“I’m not sure I have a room...” Kili mumbled honestly. The servant looked at him with wide stunned eyes, the omega looked as if he recently had a brutal beating and food was something scarce around the lavish palace.

“They prepared a room for you in the west wing...” The servant mumbled.

“I don’t know where the west wing is...” Kili felt like panicking, a simple servant knew more than he did.

“For fuck’s sake...” The servant swore angrily. “Those fucking senseless bastards...” The servant mumbled from under his crazy red fringe. “Come with me...” He pulled Kili by the hand. “Your room is on the second floor...” He dragged Kili away from the main hall and into the lavish house. “The last one in this corridor...” He continued showing Kili the way. The servant swiftly opened the door to the elegant room.

“Thank you...” Kili mumbled terrified.

“I’ll make sure you get some breakfast in the morning...” The servant mumbled.

“What’s your name?” Kili asked wanting to know at least one person around the posh palace.

“I’m Nori.” He grunted.

“Thank you Nori.” Kili tried to smiled.

The servant just stared at him. “Stay safe... and don’t do anything stupid..” He mumbled closing the door swiftly behind him.

\-------

Kili sat on the bed awaiting his doom. But the alpha never came. The door never opened, just to finally open early in the morning by the same servant. This time carrying an elegant affluent tray of food.

“When I said it was for you, they gave me this...” He smiled like a fox and set it on the table next to the bed. “Are you okay?” He asked gently.

Kili just nodded.

“That’s good!” Nori smiled.

“Do you know where I can get some clothes?” Kili asked pointing to his uncomfortable ceremonial robe.

“There should be some stuff in the wardrobe.” The servant pointed quickly and opened the door, just to show Kili rows of neatly prepared clothes. “If you need anything just tell me or any of the servants, we were told to fulfil any of your wish, within reason...” He added on a grim note.

“Within reason?” Kili mumbled.

“You can ask for food, clothes and stuff... but I’m not sure trying to leave the palace is a good idea...” The servant seemed worried.

“So I’m a slave...” Kili noticed sadly. The omega didn’t look at him with any jealousy or resentment.

“Aren’t we all?” He was grim.

“Are you hungry?” Kili asked glancing at the huge tray. The red head’s eyes followed it greedily.

“I have to earn my food... and...” The servant stopped.

“It’s too much for one person anyway... I don’t have much appetite.” Kili admitted.

The servant didn’t look convinced at all.

“Do you think I could go out to the garden?” Kili pointed outside.

“Within the walls of the palace you can roam freely.” The servant told him. “At least that was what I was told.”

Kili nodded absent-mindedly and reached for a tasty looking hot sandwich.

“Can I really?” The red head asked desperately looking at the food.

“Be my guest.” Kili assured him, and he didn’t have to ask more, soon the servant was gobbling down on a plate with pastries.

“Don’t they give you food?” He asked with worry.

The desperate shake and the tear filled eyes said it all. “Don’t ask...”

“So I’m the lucky one?” Kili mumbled eating slowly, but the sad green eyes and the slow shake indicated the servant didn’t consider Kili lucky at all.

“Try to be a good omega...” He mumbled the same words Balin and Dain told Kili hundreds of times.

“What if I’m not a good one?” Kili whispered, but the scowl was the best answer.

The servant slowly lifted his long sleeves, just showing a row of bruises. Deep, bloody and probably very painful.

“Be smart.” The omega advised finally rushing out to his other duties.

\------

Kili spend the day roaming the huge palace. He didn’t dare glance into the closed doors especially those with guards, but some rooms were open. Like the huge dining hall, vast library and kitchens. No one asked him anything and no one said anything about him roaming about, so Kili returned to his room when he saw Nori carry a full tray with food, heading in the direction of his room.

“Good, I’m hungry.” Kili eagerly followed him.

“Me too...” The servant admitted setting the tray down in his room.

“Help yourself.” Kili pointed to the food, and he swiftly began eating. “The chef here is very good.”

“Yeah... Bombur is the best...” Nori mumbled biting down.

“So servants don’t normally get meals?” Kili asked stunned with the construction of the hierarchy in the palace.

“Most get basic rations... some as punishment get none.” Nori hissed.

“So what did you do?” Kili glanced at the servant.

Nori just grimaced and tried to avoid the question. But eventually he raised his head and told him the truth. “I used to be a harem omega here... so well you get the picture.”

“No, I don’t.” Kili was surprised. “There is a harem here?” He realised in horror.

Nori simply nodded. “I’m not compliant and I can’t get pregnant so well... at first I was a servant in the harem and now I’m working the palace as punishment.”

“Why is it a punishment?” Kili asked bewildered.

“Omegas in the harem are safe from most soldiers and guards... here...” Nori bit down his lower lip.

“What about me? Do you think I’m in danger?” Kili was stunned.

“They wouldn’t dare even speak to you...” Nori assured him. “You’re the First Spouse so you’re untouchable. Your lucky they didn't send you to the harem...”

Kili glared at him. “So does my mate... does he spend time in the harem?”

Nori’s eyes were full of terror when he asked the question, and realization and fury kicked in. He didn’t need to hear the answer, to know the answer.

Kili inhaled deeply and looked away. “Do you think he’ll come to me?”

“I’ve got no idea... but when he does...” Nori’s voice was full of warning.

“I know, be a smart and good omega.” Kili bit down on his lower lip.

“And get pregnant...” Nori added the most important bit.

Kili nodded with understanding.

“He still doesn’t have an alpha heir... so that’s your only real chance to be safe here.” Nori broke the pregnant silence.

“So how many children does he have?” Kili spoke the words like venom.

“Three, and two on the way.” Nori’s words were true but brutal.

Kili looked away into the vast gardens.

“I need to go.” Nori rushed back to his duties. “I’ll come with dinner at seven.”

Kili nodded absent-mindedly and continued looking out, his brain working full speed.

\------

He spent most of his time thinking. He loved going to the library and finding a good book. No one ever noticed him, no one cared about him. No one wanted anything from him. He saw a member of his mate’s family a few times, and he always politely bowed in front of the huge majestic alpha. But the alpha never spoke to him at all. In fact apart from Nori no one talked to him. Nori was his only connection to reality, he brought him food, and organised anything he considered Kili’s prerogative. That way Kili had a bit more clothes, better food and generally his room was becoming full. But Nori just assured him it’s all normal. And Kili trusted him.

He soon realised he had to tone in his rage and spirit. He saw the scars on Nori’s arms and legs, he heard the stories of what harem life was like. And he knew he was in a trap. In his mind he was still considering escape, but hearing many stories from Nori, he knew life on the outside was horrible. At least here he was safe, in a way. As long as he wasn’t in the harem, locked and enslaved. As long as he could feel safe.

Until the day came when the alpha crossed his path. He didn’t say anything he didn’t have to. And Kili never got the chance to speak up. Everything went really fast, and later on Kili desperately tried to forget the feeling and the pain. It wasn’t nice at all, the alpha wasn’t even trying to be tender and right in the middle Kili thought about all the poor omegas who had to do it every day. He wondered how some had to try hard to force themselves to actually initiate. When he was finally left alone he wondered how to be a good omega if he was only a bed warmer just like all the harem omegas.

\-----

“How are you feeling?” He caught Nori’s worried glare a few weeks later.

“I’m just not hungry.” Kili whined.

“You haven’t been hungry in quite a while...” Nori mumbled setting the food on the table. He put a delicious pastry on the plate and shoved it at Kili. But Kili simply went green smelling it and he rushed to the bathroom in a panic.

“Well I’ll be damned!” Nori grinned at him. “I knew we talked about getting pregnant but after just one time? You’re fucking amazing!”

“What?” Kili glared at him.

“Throwing up is one of the first symptoms!” Nori made him realise with a grin.

“Seriously?” Kili looked at him surprised.

“Once you’ve cleaned up I’ll take you to the medic.” Nori smiled and passed him a towel. “We’ll make sure.”

Oin, the old medic, quickly confirmed Nori’s words.

“Looks like the second month.” The medic analysed his stomach.

“That would be correct...” Kili mumbled in shock.

“You’re going to need a special diet now, and special vitamins.” The medic told him. “I’ll send word to the kitchen to prepare a special diet for you.”

“You will need more care and rest now.” The medic told him. “Every pregnant spouse can have a personal servant and anything he needs.” The medic smiled.

“You mean Nori could be my personal servant?” Kili asked.

“I’m not sure Nori is the best...” The medic mumbled. “But if that is your wish.”

“I’d like him to take care of me.” Kili demanded.

“Maybe you should consider an omega more experienced with children?” The medic mumbled.

“I want Nori.” Kili made his demand clear.

“It can be arranged.” Oin didn’t look happy at all.

From that day Nori’s sole duty was Kili. And it made both of them happy, apart from the fact that Kili felt terrible. He was throwing up even with the special diet, and now anything made him nauseous. Nori didn’t say anything, he patiently cleaned up, washed Kili’s face and tried finding the one thing Kili could eat.

After days they found it, the one thing Kili craved for. Cheese.

So now Nori ate everything else, and Kili focused on things rich in cheese. Later when the vitamins began working and slowly Kili could eat a more varied diet, he began gaining weight. Not that it showed much on the outside.

“You’re carrying your belly low, so the child seems small.” Oin was worried. “We will have to wait and see, come twice a week.”

Kili nodded silently, the news was a bit worrying. The doctor continued talking on how a small belly could mean he was carrying an omega or beta, and that was really bad news.

“Don’t worry much, you will just harm the child.” Nori immediately scolded him. “Rest and relax, eat healthy and pray the child is healthy. I know an alpha would change a lot in your life, but you’re lucky as it is to get pregnant the first time.”

“I know...” Kili shifted to his side and tried to calm down.

“I’m going to watch over you.” Nori told him warmly.

“Can I get some soup?” Kili lifted his head.

“I’m on it!” Nori rushed to the kitchens.

The knock on the door surprised Kili, but slowly he walked up just to open the door to see two alphas on his doorstop.

“Can we come in?” The older alpha asked politely. Kili immediately bowed, this was his mate’s father and the head of the family.

“Of course!” Kili showed them into his room.

The older alpha smiled gently and sat down on Nori’s favourite armchair, but his mate didn’t seem to be happy to be there at all.

“Congratulations.” The old alpha smiled.

“Thank you Sir...” Kili bowed politely.

“We came here to talk about your situation.” The old alpha did all the talking.

Kili had no idea what to say.

“I would like to suggest that you move to the harem, you would have better care now that you’re expecting.” The alpha smiled, but Kili felt like panic. The harem was the worst idea, the omegas there brutal and competitive.

“Thank you, Sir, however I do enjoy this part of the palace.” Kili mumbled gently, trying to reign in his temper and anxiety.

“I understand.” The old alpha smiled even wider. “My mate would like you get to know you, so perhaps you would consider moving to the south wing. You would have more company and I’d feel better knowing you’re safe.”

Kili bit down the words that somehow they didn’t consider him safe in the place they were now. The only safe haven he was given.

Nori told him about the current consort, and the words were nice and full of consideration. The consort was important in the palace and Nori respected him a lot.

“I would love to meet your mate...” Kili quickly took his chance.

“Very well! I’ll tell the servants to move your things and prepare a good room for you tomorrow!” The old alpha smiled gently.

“Thank you...” Kili bowed his head even more. But the door closed, when he raised his head slightly he saw his mate standing near the door. Staring at him. The alpha did not say a word, but his eyes were narrow and suspicious. He didn’t say anything, but Kili suddenly felt very small and in danger. However the alpha was gone in a flash.


	2. Chapter 2

“I need to pack everything...” Nori was in a frenzy, he quickly handled the things gathered in the last weeks.

Kili sat there stunned.

“What is the South Wing like?” Kili asked him.

“I have no idea... I’m not allowed in. No one is... in fact it’s more secure than the harem...” Nori admitted.

“So I traded one prison for another...” Kili mumbled.

“Bilbo is really nice so it should be fine...” Nori whispered.

“You know him?” Kili asked.

“He was in the harem a really short time, the master chose him quickly and he was given the South Wing.” Nori whispered. “He was... really nice.”

Kili nodded absent-mindedly.

“This is far better than the harem...” Nori assured him. Kili wasn’t certain but he wasn’t going to protest.

A knock on the door signalled someone.

“The room is ready, we are here to help carry your things...” A servant told them. Nori swiftly grabbed the things he considered most precious.

“Please follow me.” The servant told Kili with a bow.

Nori walked behind him anxiously, but Kili was the one really worried. As they walked following the servant, Kili realised it was the part of the palace always with guards and always locked up.

Two alpha guards were always at the door, as they were now.

But this time they just opened the huge doorway.

Kili stood there stunned, the whole palace was wonderful, but this part... was beyond divine. Beautifully decorated and posh.

“Your room is the second one on the left.” The servant opened the door in front of him, and bowed staying at the doorway.

“Beautiful...” Nori mumbled as he followed in right behind him. “Let me unpack everything...” He rushed to check the drawers and closets. Soon he began preparing the room the way he thought Kili deserved.

“Can I come in?” A child’s voice asked form the doorway.

Kili stared into deep brown eyes under a dark blond fringe. The boy was an alpha, probably seven or eight.

“Of course! Welcome!” Kili greeted him.

“What’s your name?” The child asked.

“I’m Kili.” Kili tried to stay calm.

“I’m Merry!” The boy smiled sitting down on a chair.

“Merriadoc!” Someone called out in the corridor. “Where did he go?” A worried voice followed.

“In here!” The boy called.

“Dad said you’re not suppose to bother him before being formally introduced!” A boy scolded him from the doorway.

“Already done bro!” Merry didn’t seem frazzled at all. “This is my older brother Frodo.” He smiled at Kili.

“Frodo this is Kili!” Merry announced.

The blue eyed dark haired alpha stood frozen at the door.

“You should come, dad is having a big dinner in the dining room.” Frodo scolded his brother. “You’re invited as well.” He bowed politely in front of Kili. “Dad would love to finally meet you.”

Kili had no idea how, but both boys swiftly dragged him along the beautiful corridor and a right turn. Soon he found himself staring into two friendly blue eyes.

“I’m so happy to finally meet you!” The heavily pregnant omega held him tightly.

“A pleasure to meet you as well.” Kili whispered.

“Come and meet my kids!” The omega pulled him along the table. “You’ve already met Merry and Frodo, not that they were allowed to bother you so early after your arrival, this is Pip.” He pointed to the tiny omega child.

“It’s such a pleasure to have you here, this part of the palace tends to be a bit lonely.” The omega assured him warmly. “Come and sit down with us!” He smiled pointing to the rich lavish table.

Kili was stunned with the warmth. Bilbo was... the kindest person in the world. A bit feisty, extremely smart and kind. The south wing was perfect. The kids were lively and noisy, but Kili never felt so happy in the palace before. The funny thing was soon he met the boys tutor and to his amazement it was Nori’s brother Ori.

“You’re blooming.” Bilbo told him one day, as Kili seemed happier than ever. Then he saw the shadow appear.

“You’re lucky.” Kili told him gently.

“Indeed I am.” Bilbo went silent, Kili did not have to clarify. The old alpha spent every single night with Bilbo, and most of every day. He played with the kids, read books to them and was there. Kili was alone, save from the tiny moves under his heart, and save from his friends.

“I’m sorry.” Bilbo gently held him.

“I’m not. It could have been much worse...” Kili tried to hide the tears.

“I know... I’ve been to the harem... that’s why I proposed this solution...” Bilbo showed an even warmer side to himself. “You’re family now.”

“Thank you...” Kili mumbled realising that it was Bilbo’s doing that he wasn’t sent to the harem. That he was given a second option.

“I’m going to take care of you and help you.” Bilbo assured him.

\------

As the pregnancy was slowly coming to an end, Kili found himself under the tender care of everyone. Bilbo despite having omega twins Fror and Gror, he spent a lot of time with him. The kids were always there, and the tiny talkative Pip was a great addition. Nori and Ori were always around, and now Kili truly felt safe.

“Everything is going to be just fine...” Bilbo held his hand, but the sudden deep feeling of being torn to shreds made Kili cringe.

“Nori get the medic!” Bilbo urged the servant to rush.

“Just breathe!” Bilbo tried to calm him down, but it didn’t change a thing.

Giving birth is not nice at all, and for Kili it was horrible. The pain, despite the medication, made him even more agitated and nervous. It lasted far too long, caused way too much pain, and all the way Kili swore he would rather die than let the alpha touch him again.

“A beautiful strong alpha boy!” The medic was delighted. Kili just cringed. His whole body hurt, and the crying didn’t make him happy at all.

“Here you are!” Bilbo passed the child to Kili, but at first sight Kili wanted to scream. The boy had golden blond hair, and once he opened his eyes... Kili wanted to cruse the world, and swear like never before, but he couldn’t. He tried to hide his emotional reaction, and he gently took the child.

The first days were horrible. The child cried and cried, and Kili had to feed it, wash it and take care of it. Nori was always there at his side, doing anything possible to help. Bilbo was there, but Kili felt overwhelmed. Parenthood wasn’t his dream, it was his ticket into the best part of the palace and under Bilbo’s care, but it was dull and tedious.

“Why don’t you love him?” Frodo’s voice broke Kili’s sulking.

“It’s not that...” Kili mumbled, but suddenly he realised the boy spoke the truth. He so far didn’t feel anything towards the crying and demanding baby. It wasn’t his son’s fault. Nothing was... in fact the child should be considered a blessing.

“He’s adorable...” Frodo gently touched the boy’s hair.

“I’m just tired...” Kili complained.

“If you need more help, just say so... we’ll all find time to watch over him.” Merry assured him. “After all he’s the next heir.” He smiled without any viciousness.

“Thank you...” Kili told both boys. “Thank you for everything.”

He tried to take care of the boy better, he tried not to see the eyes and hair. He tried to think of the good things. His father’s fortune would now be secured. His son would inherit it all...

\------

“I’m planning the naming ceremony for next week.” The old alpha declared at dinner. “Your presence is required.” He told the panicking Kili.

“It’s tradition.” Bilbo announced flowing his mate’s words.

Kili slowly nodded with defeat.

“Very well, so I’ll invite the guests.” Thorin smiled gently. “I’m very proud of him.” Kili already knew the old alpha showed huge interest towards the baby, on one hand it made him agitated, but on the other it made him feel safe.

Bilbo winked at Kili, but it didn’t change Kili’s worries into dust.

\------

The ceremony meant trouble for a fair number of reasons, first of all his mate never even came to see their child. Secondly Kili didn’t really feel like another huge public ceremony, during which he would be marooned again.

“Don’t worry.” Bilbo tried to reassure him, but Kili knew he was also shocked with the lack of attention.

Nori helped him dress into the best robe he could find, the child was also prepared, and Thorin declare he would carry the heir into the main dining hall.

Walking in Kili felt huge anger. His mate was already there, acting as if nothing special was going on. As if this ceremony was an everyday event, as if it wasn’t his son... The female omega sitting right next to him, with a wicked smile didn’t help even one bit. Kili raised his head even higher. He was the bonded mate, the first spouse, and this was just a random harem whore. He gave birth to the alpha heir, and no other child would stand in his way.

“Dear guests!” Thorin spoke up. “We have gathered here for a great historical event. A new son of Durin has been born!” He raised the child up high. The demanding boy chose that very moment to protest loudly, only to make his grandfather laugh. “And what a strong voice he has!” Thorin joked embracing the child. “He will bear the name of Frerin, and one day he will inherit everything you see around you! May he grow strong and wise!” The guests began cheering, but as much as they seemed to enjoy the speech, they also were fascinated with the lavish amounts of food.

“Take good care of him.” Thorin gently gave the child to Kili, who eagerly pressed him into his chest. “From today he’s the heir of not only the Durin family but also of Ironhills, and that makes me heart burst with joy.” The old alpha was very pleased. Kili tenderly kissed his child’s head and gently rocked him to make him calm down.

He felt the burning glare on him, the harem omega accompanying his mate was burning a hole in his head. But Kili was stronger than that. He was better than any harem omega, so he just ignored it and focused his attention on his son.

His alpha did not even look at him or his son, but Kili didn’t care. In fact the sudden realization made him happy. In a strange way this bonding meant freedom. His mate did not give a shit about him or their son, and at the same time he did not interfere with anything.

A few days from the ceremony, Kili felt suddenly very happy. His son finally let him sleep a whole night, and the blond hair and cute blue eyes instead of causing anger began causing joy. The bright smile always there, the huge blue eyes full of love and happiness. It was all Kili needed to feel happy.

“He’s going to grow strong.” Bilbo was very pleased seeing Kili happy.

“Thank you for accepting me into the family...” Kili admitted honestly.

“You’re welcome... you make this place a bit less lonely.” Bilbo smiled, but suddenly he went pale and rushed to the bathroom.

“Again?” Kili asked him, but the slow tired nod didn’t express happiness.

“I’m getting a bit too old for this...” The omega looked defeated.

“I’m going to help you.” Kili assured him passing a clean towel to wipe his face.

“You’re a blessing...” Bilbo accepted his help getting up.


	3. Chapter 3

“I’d like to talk with you.” The huge alpha standing in the doorway seemed tired.

“Of course Sir!” Kili bowed his head and left Frerin with Nori.

“This way please...” Thorin lead him towards the library and the offices next to it.

“Dear Kili!” Kili was suddenly ambushed by Gandalf.

“It’s so good to see you in good health!” The old man gently held him. “Are you happy here?” The sudden question was full of worry.

“In a way.” Kili mumbled.

“Good!” Gandalf pointed to the room. “There is someone here who wants to see you!”

“Balin!” Kili rushed to his teacher and mentor. “Dwalin!” He bowed in front of the huge alpha, his father's best friend and councillor.

“Dear boy!” Balin whispered and held him tightly.

“Sit down please, we have much to discuss.” Bilbo gently pushed them all at the table.

“Why are we all meeting here?” Kili looked around spooked.

“Things have changed, and we need to prepare for further changes in your situation.” Balin pulled out tones of papers.

Kili desperately sat down and with wide eyes observed his teacher. “You are no longer the heir of Ironhills, your son is.” Balin reminded him. “Thus we have to appoint a caretaker for the properties until he becomes of age.”

“I thought you and Dwalin would continue that role.” Kili mumbled.

Gandalf just smiled. “That was also my conclusion.”

“However Thorin might express a different opinion.” Dwalin looked at his old friend carefully.

“In fact that is the best solution for Frerin.” Bilbo spoke up in a strong voice. “The Durin family does not need the properties, and your decision making has been faultless in the passing months.”

Kili looked at Thorin and Bilbo surprised. “You wouldn’t oppose that?”

“Bilbo is right, in Frerin’s best interest is Balin and Dwalin handling his inheritance.” Thorin agreed.

“So that’s decided.” Gandalf nodded. “Coming to the second topic. Are you happy with your bonding?” He asked Kili head on.

Kili looked at Thorin and Bilbo terrified, that was the one question he did not want to answer. Finally he looked down, and as Balin took his hand tears came to his eyes.

“You’re not happy...” Bilbo whispered.

“A bonding should look a bit differently... and even if my mate is suffering from rut... this is far from what a bonding should be.” Kili mumbled looking at Thorin and Bilbo with tears. “However I do not want to be banished from this family... I want my son to be raised with his kin...”

“I apologize for him... but as you probably understand there is no way to force him to love you...” Thorin looked defeated.

“I just don’t want to be a slave...” Kili mumbled.

“You are not. The first contract clarified that.” Thorin insisted. “If you want the bonding to be cancelled we can have it done, especially now that Frerin has been born. You could continue to live here with us, and the financial agreements would stand.”

Kili looked down, cancelling would mean a lot of things... his position as first spouse and all the rights would be lost. Legally he would be an unmated omega with a bastard child, even if the child were the heir to two rich families...

“I want my rights to be guaranteed.” Kili suddenly spoke up. “This bonding does not have meaning for me, but it will change Frerin’s legal status. As much as I’m not happy with my mate... the position of first spouse, contrary to what would happen... it’s still a better choice...”

“I agree... but... you must consider the worst case scenario as well. My son... he will not love you. On a whim he might punish you and banish you to the harem...” Thorin looked depressed.

“We could guarantee more rights, you as the head of family could give him an even higher position.” Gandalf suddenly spoke up. “You can decide for both Fili and Kili.”

Thorin looked at him surprised. “That’s unheard of... but legally it does seem to have merit...”

“I will help write the documents.” Bilbo declared with flare.

Kili looked around surprised.

“But I’d also like you to include Kili’s right to manage both of Frerin’s inheritances. Fili has been unstable... and even you can’t be blind enough not to notice what he’s been doing.” Gandalf spoke with strength. “He’s unfit to make decisions and manage the estates and properties.”

“That’s actually a very good idea... I’m growing old and tired.” Bilbo looked up with a spark in his eyes.

“An omega deciding about properties and estates?” Kili looked at him stunned.

“What do you think I’ve been doing the last ten years?” Bilbo took his hand strongly. “I’ll teach you how, and you could help me.”

“Very well. Balin and Bilbo prepare the documents.” Gandalf stood up strong.

\------

Kili was observing Bilbo with great worry. He was focused on teaching him, but Kili already knew a lot from Balin. But the real problem was not the knowledge about managing estates, it was Bilbo’s psychological and physical condition. He was depressed, he was without any energy and appetite. Ori and Nori focused on all the kids, Frodo and Merry seemed to notice Bilbo’s bad condition and tried to help with the younger kids. But everyone was aware something was wrong.

“What’s wrong?” Kili cornered Oin, the old doctor tried to look away.

“Tell me what’s going on with him.” Kili spoke in a strong decisive tone, just like his old self.

“He shouldn’t have more kids... the last pregnancy was already difficult and the birth was horrible...” The doctor mumbled.

“Fucking shit!” Kili looked out the window trying to hide his tears. Childbirth was hell for male omegas, he remembered his own, and now...

“He should rest more, less stress and maybe he’ll get lucky again...” The doctor was worried.

“I’ll make sure he does.” Kili swore and rushed back to the South Wing.

\-------

“Fucking hell!” Kili woke up feeling a huge pain in his abdomen. “Why in seven hells was I born like this...” He continued cursing.

“What’s wrong?” Nori asked from the doorway, but he didn’t need to ask. “I’ll go to Oin to get you some painkillers...” He pulled Frerin out of his crib and left him with the servants taking care of Pip and the twins.

“What’s going on?” Thorin stopped the frantically running around servant.

“Kili...” Nori tried to catch his breath. “He struck heat... I need to go to the doctor and get him painkillers...”

Thorin nodded and looked at the doorway sad. It shouldn’t be like that at all...

He walked towards the part of the palace he hated. The part that almost killed his beloved Bilbo, if it were his choice... He shooed away all the omegas thrilled to see him, and he continued walking towards his son. His despicable unworthy rut crazed son. His greatest failure. An heir not worthy of being an heir. He used to be such a sweet child... but now he was just a shell of his old self. Drinking too much, spending way too much time in the harem. He practically lived there now, and kept having kids with random omegas, ignoring the one omega and child he should spend time with. Thorin’s failure.

He saw the surprised glare, but his eyes weren’t sharp as they used to be.

“You have a duty to fulfil. And I expect you to fulfil it.” Thorin told him firmly.

“What duty?” Fili mumbled in anger.

“Your spouse is in heat. It’s your duty.” Thorin walked out leaving everything in Fili’s hands. He knew Kili was strong enough to endure the heat, too stubborn and strong for an omega, but he deserved to have it over without the pain.

\-------

When the door eventually opened Kili was expecting Nori. He felt too unwell to have any guests, and he was certain his son was in good hands. Either Nori’s or one of the most trusted servants. He tried to forget the pain, the brutal clench of the stomach, the stupid physiology of being an omega.

“Is it really that much pain?” The voice surprised him.

Kili raised his head just to see the one person he didn’t want to. But he had no words in his head, the sudden smell invaded his nose and his legs began shaking. The feeling of being very wet, and his body burning like a furnace reduced him to a whore. A mindless sex crazed whore. He hated sex, it was absolutely horrible... but his instincts were going crazy.

“Let me help you...” The gentle words were a surprise. So far the alpha was never gentle with him, but even now his body was going crazy.

The touch wasn’t what Kili wanted, but his body melted. The scent was driving him crazy... It wasn’t painful like the first time, it wasn’t what Kili wanted, but his body was thrilled to feel filled to the brim. He wanted to yell and scream. He wanted to fight, but at the same time his body was dying from the extreme pleasure...

He wanted to be held tenderly and with love, but as soon as the pain subsided, the alpha just walked out on him.

\------

“I’m sorry...” Thorin gently apologized. “But otherwise you’d be in huge pain for days.”

“The more you force him, the more he will resent me.” Kili looked away. He understood the old alpha’s reasons, his pain was now gone, and a new child was already nestling in his body. The old alpha was selfish, but Kili was thrilled to have yet another child.

“I’m not going to ask him again.” Thorin promised.

“I’m fine with pain.” Kili told him firmly.

“I realise but... it’s his duty.” Thorin insisted. “And everything is going wrong with his perception of duty.”

“Let’s just leave the topic. I don’t want him to come to me.” Kili made it clear.

Thorin just nodded sadly.

“You should convince Bilbo to do the operation after the child is born.” Kili told him bitterly. “If he survives this birth, he will not survive a next.”

Thorin immediately had tears in his eyes.

“I will help to the best of my ability with all the kids.” Kili tried to ease his pain.

“You’re a blessing...” Thorin gently kissed his forehead in a fatherly fashion. “I wish he could finally see your worth...”

“He will never change.” Kili was bitter. “But I don’t give a shit. I care about the kids, you and Bilbo.”

Thorin looked even more depressed hearing that, but his eyes were full of understanding.

 -------

“I’m not feeling well... can you go to that meeting...” Bilbo asked him pleadingly. The same thing happened time after time, Bilbo was tired or feeling ill, and Kili had to handle things. He didn’t mind at all, despite the second pregnancy he was feeling absolutely fine. So he didn’t mind the meetings with merchants, business people or suppliers. But every time he left Bilbo, he was dying of worry. He wanted Bilbo to get better, he wanted everything to stay as it was. But Bilbo was fading. The pregnancy too difficult for him.

At the beginning people treated him strangely, but he managed just fine. Balin taught him well, Bilbo gave him advice and slowly Kili was getting the hang of it. Sometimes the old alpha would come but he let Kili make the decisions, only giving advice and assisting him. His presence and acknowledgement made Kili feel strong, and the stronger he was the more he gave his heart to handling everything for his family.

“You really are a blessing...” Bilbo held his hand. He was now bedridden, the bulging stomach making it really difficult to get up. Thorin would assist him day and night, evidently extremely worried.

Kili held his hand as strong as possible.

“Promise me... that if anything happens to me, you’ll take care of the kids...” Bilbo’s voice surprised him.

“Nothing is going to happen to you! You have to stay strong!” Kili insisted with all his might.

“There is nothing we can do... I can rest, take herbs and medicine, eat healthy...” Bilbo was gloomy.

“If you give up... that’s just like dying. Stay strong and fight... you have a lot to live for...” Kili insisted with strength.

“So make me sleep safe... promise me... I want to know my kids are safe...” Bilbo demanded strongly. “I need to hear it...”

“I’ll take care of all your kids, I’ll handle the family fortune... I’ll run this fucking stupid palace and I’ll make sure my kids and your kids have a fortune to inherit.” Kili spoke with flare.

“That’s what I needed to hear...” Bilbo had tears in his eyes. He closed his eyes with pain.

“I’ll get the doctor!” Kili mumbled in panic and he rushed to the hallway, he grabbed the first servant and ordered to get Oin.

He rushed back to him, but Bilbo was dead pale and gray. Kili walked around the bed in worry, only to notice the sheets go red.

“Fucking hell!” He lifted the sheet to see a sea of red flow down his friend’s legs.

When Oin arrived the news was grim, a few servants rushed to carry Bilbo to the medical room.

“Get Thorin!” Kili ordered a servant.

By the time the doctor pulled the child out, and made sure Bilbo wasn’t going to die, Kili almost died himself. He was so worried and so depressed, but there was nothing he could do. Standing there and watching made him feel vulnerable.

“Can you take him?” Oin begged him.

“Of course!” Kili swiftly reached for the tiny omega child.

“His name is Sam.” Oin mumbled and rushed back to Bilbo.

Kili tried to make the child calm down, but eventually he gave up and just carried him into the nursery.

“Is it a boy or a girl?” Pip demanded seeing him.

“A tiny omega boy called Sam.” Kili gently told him.

“We have a brother?” Frodo was thrilled.

“We have another omega brother?” Merry sounded worried.

“What about Dad?” Pip asked worried.

“He’s not well.” Kili didn’t say more, he didn’t have to, all the kids had tears in his eyes.

“Is Dad going to...” Frodo whispered with tears.

“I’m not sure... but the doctor is trying to save him.” Kili told them honestly.

Soon all the kids were crying in his arms all desperate about the situation.

“Ada...” Frerin asked to be lifted and Kili eagerly pulled him into his arms after laying the tiny child down. “I’m going to take care of all of you...”

“I wish he didn’t have this child if it means we might lose him!” Frodo yelled out in anger.

“Don’t you ever say so!” Kili slapped him. “He is your brother... it was your father’s choice to give him life!”

“Family has to protect one another, you have to protect him, I have to protect all of you...” Kili held him tightly.

“I don’t want him to die...” Frodo sobbed in depression.

“We all love him...” Kili kissed his hair. “We’re not going to let him die...” He vowed.

A few days later it was evident Bilbo would live, but his condition wasn’t favourable. He was weak, had huge trouble walking, and most of the time he was in bed. Kili made sure all the kids visited him, he made sure everything was running smoothly just to make him more comfortable.

“How are you feeling?” Bilbo’s weak hand gently brushed his now full belly.

“I’m feeling great.” Kili assured him. “Don’t worry about me, take care of yourself.”

“I’m going to try...” Bilbo promised.


	4. Chapter 4

A few weeks later Kili gave birth to a tiny omega boy himself, and now he had two infants to tend to. Sam and Dior.

“He’s lovely...” Bilbo brushed the pale blond hair.

“He is... both are going to be blond.” Kili smiled gently.

“But he has your eyes.” Bilbo smiled and gently held Kili. “A tiny miracle.”

“Our little miracles.” Kili agreed, he was now taking care of both boys, and he loved every minute of it.

“He was worth the pain.” Bilbo whispered gently. “Every child is.”

“I hope you’ll feel better soon.” Kili told him gently.

“I pray so...” Bilbo seemed even more tired than normal.

“I’m going to help you...” Kili mumbled.

“You’re a blessing...” Bilbo kissed his cheek gently.

Kili just nodded, somehow he didn’t feel as strong as Bilbo insisted he was. Sometimes he felt like crying at night, but he had to be strong and strive.

“You’re going to manage just fine...” Bilbo seemed calm.

\------

“Thank you for everything...” Thorin’s voice was full of sorrow. The old alpha suddenly seemed very old and very tired. The whole situation with Bilbo was talking its toll on Thorin, and Kili saw the huge pain on his face. He seemed frail and old, Kili was immensely worried about their situation. The old alpha dropped all duties onto Kili, Bilbo was too frail to handle business, so now it was Kili pushing forward the entire family.

“Your presence brings hope to my heart... I know my kids will be safe with you...” Thorin’s words sounded surprising, and Kili didn’t dare ask what he meant.

Time passed quickly, Kili was so busy he had barely time to sleep and rest. Even at night he would hold his sons and pray they had a good life. Especially Dior. The life of alphas was way better than he life of an omega. And at night Kili often felt great worry about the fate of Dior, Pip, Fror, Gror and Sam.

“Sir, an honourable guest has arrived!” A servant rushed to him.

“Ask Thorin to come...” Kili mumbled, most meeting like that Thorin still handled himself.

“He said he doesn’t feel well, and he can’t come.” The servant was pale and nervous.

“I’ll come, serve the guests good food and drinks.” Kili rushed to get one of his most elegant robes.

By the time he made it to the elegant sitting room, tea and cake were already served onto the table.

Kili bowed politely. “It’s a great pleasure to be in the presence of such renowned guests...” He greeted them. The short red haired man was his mate’s cousin, and the pale blond was his bonded first spouse.

“We’ve came to see how Thorin is doing... my father is greatly worried.” Gimli told him slowly.

“Thorin is not feeling well.” Kili admitted pouring the tea with his best elegant manners.

“That is sad news.” Legolas spoke up, he was visibly pregnant.

“How far along are you?” Kili asked him tenderly.

“Four months...” Legolas seemed surprised with the question.

“Congratulations... Take care of yourself.” Kili tried to smile.

“Could you please tell Thorin that the document he wanted is ready, my father will come next week so it is signed and officially registered.” Gimli spoke slowly.

“I will tell him.” Kili eagerly nodded.

“You’ve been doing a great job, Thorin speaks highly of you.” Gimli smiled gently.

Kili felt strange, as if he should be happy, but was too embarrassed to express it.

“I’m his advisor and lawyer, as my father was before me...” Gimli admitted.

“I have been told.” Kili spoke in a more official tone.

“Do you know what the document contains?” Gimli asked him curiously.

Kili nodded, he knew Thorin’s intensions well. They discussed it many times with Bilbo, Nori and Ori.

“Are you sure you can handle it?” Legolas asked him calmly.

“I have no other choice.” Kili whispered. “Either I handle it, or my family will suffer.”

“You’re everything Thorin said you are.” Gimli smiled. “Tell Thorin I came and about the visit next week, I will have to see him personally regardless of his condition.”

“I will arrange it.” Kili assured him.

“My father, Gandalf and Dwalin will witness the signing.” Gimli told him.

“I will make sure he is ready.” Kili told him.

\--------

“It is done...” Thorin seemed very tired, all his friends were stunned with his weakened condition.

“I’m glad you’re surrounded by people you can trust.” Gandalf held his hand.

“Kili is special...” Thorin nodded.

“How is Bilbo doing?” Gandalf asked gently.

But the tears in Thorin’s eyes said it all.

“I’m so sorry my dear friend...” Gandalf looked away sadly.

“From now on, Kili Ironfoot will manage both fortunes, all assets and properties.” Gimli read the document. “After your death be will act as regent for Frerin Durin.”

“And Frerin Durin is your sole heir.” Gloin summed up. “Are you sure that’s the way you want it?”

“That’s the way it must be... Fili is unfit...” Thorin looked away with pain.

“What about Frodo and Merry?” Gandalf asked.

“Kili will raise them and divide a proper part of the inheritance in due time. This way Fili cannot claim any of the inheritance, or take regency over his brothers’ inheritance.” Thorin spoke in a grim tone. “I trust you will do what’s right.” He looked at Kili.

“I will keep my word.” Kili assured him.

“We will be there to advise and help you with anything you might need.” Gandalf assured him.

\-------

Bilbo was still not himself, and he couldn’t regain his strength. The more he was weak, the more Thorin became frail and old.

“I fear death...” Thorin confessed to Kili. “I’m so sacred I will not see my loved ones ever again...”

“You have to stay strong...” Kili tried to ignite his spirit, but he could see the depression. Seeing Bilbo so weak and so frail was killing Thorin. Kili kept wondering how much they loved each other, how devoted they were to each other. Kili didn’t know love like that, but it made him wonder... In his own life there was no hope for love like that. No hope at all...

“Damn the seven hells!” Kili woke up dead angry. He had a huge list of duties, he had the kids, he had the management duties, and another heat was the worst news possible.

“Ask Oin if he could give me something not to have these retched heats...” Kili complained. “Why don’t you get them?”

“I can’t... I’m damaged...” Nori whispered.

“Lucky you...”  Kili mumbled.

“I’ll get you some painkillers...” Nori rushed.

“Wait...” Kili stopped him. “Even with the herbs it will take me days to come back to normal.”

“There are no other options...” Nori stood there stunned.

Kili glared at the ceiling, and finally reached for a piece of paper and pen. He swiftly wrote a message.

“Have it delivered.” He gave it to Nori.

“Are you sure you want this?” Nori was stunned.

“It’s the easiest way to deal with this.” Kili shrugged.

He didn’t have to wait long. The alpha standing in the doorway just glared at him without a word. Kili wondered how selfish he was, not realising how much his family needed him, but turning his back on them just for the sake of the harem. For the sake of sex. And the call for sex was never rejected.

His eyes were wide, as he sniffed the air. The scent seemed to drive him crazy.

“Why don’t you want to come to the harem and stay with me?” The alpha’s question surprised him.

“Why don’t you leave the harem and come and stay with me?” Kili mumbled the same words back at him.

“My place is there...” The alpha mumbled.

“My place is here.” Kili whispered.

The alpha’s hand brushed his face tenderly. “I wish you would stay with me...” He whispered gently tracing Kili’s face.

“So leave the harem and stay...” Kili told him feeling extremely weak.

“You would be one of my favourites...” The alpha gently traced his hair.

Kili bit down his lips, and the angry words were never voiced. He wanted to yell at him, tell him how much it was annoying. How it made him angry the alpha didn’t care about him or their kids. How much he neglected his father and brothers.

“I don’t want to be one of your favourites.” Kili finally told him.

The alpha didn’t say anything more, he tried not to show any emotion but lust, and soon it was only instinct and lust between them. Kili didn’t want to talk, his life was set, the alpha was gone, and Kili was in charge. He had duties and responsibilities, words foreign to the selfish alpha. He was good only for making the heats go away, and for seeding more children into Kili’s womb when convenient.

“What do you want then?” The alpha sat on the bed lingering even when it was over.

“I’m happy as it is. Just do what you do.” Kili grimaced. His body was pleasantly stretched but he already had ten things going on in his head, things he had to get up to and handle. He didn’t need the alpha lingering and taking more of his time than absolutely necessary.

“So my presence is a bother?” The alpha asked slowly.

Kili bit down his tongue and the witty answer he had. Instead he took a moment and decided the more diplomatic approach. “So far I had the impression my existence was a bother to you.”

The alpha just blinked. Kili didn’t want to continue talking, instead he rushed to the bathroom to get ready for his duties. To his surprise the alpha was still there when he walked in half naked with a towel around him. But Kili decided not to worry about him at all. He rushed to the wardrobe just to get dressed.

“Why are you in such a hurry?” The alpha suddenly asked.

“I have duties I need to tend to.” Kili shrugged.

“What duties?” The alpha just continued to sit on his bed.

Kili glanced at him, not believing what he just heard... was the alpha so far away from reality?

“I promised Bilbo to take care of the kids.” Kili avoided any more details. The alpha didn’t seem to mind the answer at all, he just laid back on the bed. “Are you hungry?” He asked.

“A bit...” The alpha admitted.

“I’ll ask a servant to bring something.” Kili rushed to the door.

“Are you going to come back?” The question made him stop at the doorway.

“Eventually, but you don’t have to wait here.” Kili slammed the door behind him. First he had to rush to Nori to pass on a full list of instructions.

“How are you feeling?” Bilbo seemed worried. He was laying on a comfortable bed, and the younger kids were playing on the floor. Frodo and Merry were probably with Ori.

“I’m going to be fine.” Kili dismissed the problem. “I’m more worried about you...”

Bilbo tried to look strong, but the shade was in his eyes.

“Come here!” Kili pulled Pip, Frer, Gror and Fror onto the huge bed. “Bilbo needs a strong hug... and only the five of us can do it!”

“We love you Daddy!” Pip embraced Bilbo with a huge smile.

“I love you too... My three strong boys, and my beloved grandson...” Bilbo held them close. “Could you go and check on Dior and Sam?”

“I’m on my way!” Kili declared. “You four have to keep a close eye on Bilbo and make sure he eats lunch!”

“Yes Daddy!” Frer assured him.

After checking on the youngest children in the nursery, Kili swung by the library making sure the oldest two were with Ori. Later Nori reported on the instructions he gave, Kili spotted a servant taking a huge tray with food towards his room.

“I’ll take it...” Kili reached for the tray. “Just open the door for me.”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Nori sounded worried.

“Please do everything on the list.” Kili reminded him. “Thank you.” He added in a tired voice.

To his surprise the alpha was still lingering in his room. He set down the tray, but the sleeping figure on the bed seemed oblivious to his presence.

“You said you were hungry...” Kili gently placed a hand on his arm.

But the alpha simply pulled him into his arms.

“Welcome back beautiful...” The alpha mumbled and held him close. Kili didn’t feel like more sex, but the alpha had other ideas. The hands roaming his body were energetic and tender. And it wasn’t unpleasant at all. And the warm kisses made it even better.

“So you brought lunch?” The alpha continued caressing him as they laid in bed.

“Just some food.” Kili tried to get a grip. All the events stirred him up a bit, and now he had no idea what to think of the alpha’s actions. They were sitting at the table and eating as if it was perfectly normal.

When Kili awoke the next morning he was alone again. Without any explanation, without a word. As if the day together did not exist, as if he was never there.

He shrugged it off and rushed to his kids, he had more than enough worries.


	5. Chapter 5

“So how are you feeling?” Kili sat at Bilbo’s bedside. It was one of those rare moments when Nori and Ori took all the kids into the gardens, and Kili could finally talk to him uninterrupted.

“I’m fine...” Bilbo tried to lie.

“Stop lying.” Kili grunted.

Bilbo inhaled and looked away with pain in his eyes.

“Have you talked to Oin?” Kili told him firmly.

“He’ll say the same thing as always... that I need more vitamins and rest...” Bilbo assured him.

“What if that’s not the case?” Kili asked him carefully. He saw the flicker of fear in Bilbo’s eyes, and he suddenly knew the truth. “I would like to arrange a consultation.”

“A consultation?” Bilbo was suddenly very scared.

“A medical one.” Kili told him. “I know a person who has the right knowledge and experience... however there is one problem...”

Bilbo raised his head slowly the question visible in his eyes.

“Your mate... Thorin might have a lot against.” Kili told him slowly. “But if I ask, that person will come.”

“I’ll talk to Thorin... but I need to know what to talk about.” Bilbo looked at him sternly.

“Rivendell... a member of the Rivendell family.” Kili admitted.

“That might be extremely difficult.” Bilbo was worried.

\-------

“It’s out of the question!” Thorin barged into Kili’s office with anger on his face. Kili shrank in the chair, the fearful omega taking over.

“Do you care about Bilbo?” Kili tried to be as calm as possible.

Thorin stopped with his mouth open.

“Even if you ask them, no one from that family will ever help one of us!” Thorin stared out the window. He was visibly shacking, and he looked even more frail than ever.

“If I ask, someone will come.” Kili assured him.

“You really think they will waste time for just an omega?” Thorin was suddenly down, his eyes sad and figure tense.

“If I ask, someone with the right medical knowledge and experience will come... but it’s going to be an omega.” Kili warned him.

Thorin glared at him with a million questions in his eyes.

“Arwen Strider will answer if I ask her to come.” Kili told him.

“The daughter of Elrond? Bonded to Aragorn Strider?” Thorin shot questions immediately, his mind still sharp as a razor. “Why would she even bother and why would her mate let her?” He scowled.

“She’s my sister.” Kili mumbled.

“Your what?” Thorin was stunned.

“We had the same omega father.” Kili mumbled. “I was born to Dain Ironhill but in the Rivendell harem.”

Thorin just glared at him in complete shock.

“Your sister?” Thorin whispered.

Kili nodded, no more words were needed.

“Reach out... if she arrives I will welcome her with all the hope in my heart.” Thorin eventually whispered.

“I’ll write to her today.” Kili nodded.

“Send it by courier.” Thorin advised.

“I was planning to do so.” Kili assured him.

\-------

The reply came just a few days later, just at the same time as Oin confirmed Kili’s third pregnancy. Arwen apologised for not being able to come within the following month because she was carrying herself. But she assured him that as soon as she gave birth she would arrange a visit. Kili breathed in with relief, and swiftly wrote about his own pregnancy.

“I keep wondering how you always bloom when pregnant.” Nori smiled at Kili and passed him a robe. As the pregnancy was progressing Nori was trying to take more and more off his shoulders yet again. The faithful friend always could see when Kili was more tired than he claimed and he rushed to be there.

“The only advantage of mating.” Kili reached for the robe.

“For me it wouldn’t work anyway...” Nori hissed and looked away.

“What happened?” Kili finally asked him.

But Nori looked away. Kili always wondered what happened in the harem and why Nori hated that place so much. Why he was banished from it for an even worse fate.

“Nori I need to know.” Kili suddenly insisted. “I’m going to have someone special come in, and I’d like her to take a look at you.”

Nori looked at him in shock. “I’m not worth the time of any fancy doctor...”

“Nori...” Kili told him in a firm voice Nori heard a few times before. It was a non discussion tone, demanding an answer.

With a grunt Nori sat on the bed. “When I came I wasn’t really interested in sex. I avoided the alphas and tried to keep Ori safe.”

“Go on.” Kili encouraged him.

“It was fairly easy when the old alpha would come... he was kind and he always made sure things in the harem were fair. But then Bilbo arrived, and from day one I knew he was special. The alpha adored him, he was nice to everyone and... he got pregnant with Frodo swiftly.” Nori continued.

“So Bilbo took Ori with him to help with the child, when Thorin proposed to mate Bilbo and give him a part of the palace.” Kili easily concluded.

Nori simply nodded.

“So what happened later?” Kili became really suspicious.

Nori tried to look away and avoid answering yet again.

“Nori...” Kili needed answers.

“Your mate... he prefers female omegas... so all us males were treated really bad... he wasn’t interested in us at all... so Shelob... you met her at the naming ceremony... she...” Nori had tears in his eyes.

“Tell me.” Kili glared at Nori strongly.

“She killed Jules... and she...” Nori had problems speaking, tears blinding him completely.

“What did she do to you?” Kili asked him.

“She drugged me and hurt me...” Nori looked even more away. “Later I was deemed unfit for the harem, so I was sent among the omegas the guests could use... Eventually she convinced your mate I was unworthy of anything in the harem and I was made a servant...”

Kili glared at him, and slowly the conclusions in his head were getting more and more disturbing.

“I’ll arrange her visit here, and you will be examined even if I have to drag you to the meeting.” Kili told him firmly. “I’ll make sure Shelob never steps out of that stupid harem ever again...”

“There is nothing you can do... your mate...” Nori had tears in his eyes.

“I run the show.” Kili held his hands. “And he has power only over the harem, and of nothing else.”

“She’s dangerous... and your mate...” Nori was alert.

“He loves to fuck her... I know.” Kili hissed. “But she has no power outside the harem, and she has no power over you...”

“It was so terrifying...” Nori was broken and shaken, his whole body shacking in terror.

“I’m going to ruin her...” Kili embraced him and whispered. “And I’ll make sure you and all the kids are safe...”

\-------

“I’m sorry for him...” Thorin passed Kili a cup of tea and embraced him gently.

“He’s a jerk...” Kili told him honestly.

“He’s worse than that...” Thorin was devastated.

“There is nothing you could do.” Kili told him gently.

“Thank you for handling everything...” Thorin sat down with difficulty.

“It’s my duty...” Kili whispered. “I have to take care of all of you...”

“I just wish...” Thorin went all emotional.

“Don’t worry... I’ll handle all the things. Arwen will arrive soon and examine Bilbo and you, and later on I’ll make sure you both have enough rest and time to focus on the kids.” Kili assured him.

“Don’t you mind all the boring business duties?” Thorin gently asked.

“I love them.” Kili smiled. “That’s the best part...”

“You’re funny for an omega... but I couldn’t be more grateful.” The old alpha was full of relief.

“I’ll begin teaching Merry and Frodo soon.” Kili admitted. “They both need to know how to manage everything. Soon their word will be worth more than mine.”

“I made your word above everyone else’s.” Thorin reminded him. “Even above my sons. All of my sons.”

Kili looked at him in shock, but he knew those actions were to protect him. To protect the whole family. “I won’t disappoint you.”

“I know.” Thorin smiled a weak smile. “I’m proud you’re my family.”

“Even though I’m related to the Rivendells?”

“Even though.” Thorin agreed.

\--------

Arwen’s arrival was a loud and noisy one. She came in with a crowd of people, and Kili made sure she got the best guest room in the entire palace.

“It’s so good to see you!” Arwen immediately embraced him. “You’ve met my husband?”

“A pleasure...” Kili gently lowered his head.

“Arwen has spoken warmly of you.” Aragorn held his hand gently. “A true pleasure to finally meet you in person.”

“These are my oldest kids!” Arwen pushed a cute looking boy and girl at him. “Kids, this is your uncle Kili.”

“Follow me, lunch should be served!” Kili showed them into the most fancy dining room.

“Are we eating alone?” Arwen was stunned.

“I’ll explain later.” Kili whispered to him and told the servants to begin serving the food.

He could feel Arwen’s deep blue eyes follow him, but he didn’t want to talk about private things in front of the kids and family.

“This food is yummy!” The tiny girl announced with a happy grin.

“We have the best chef!” Kili told her with a wink.

“Can I meet my cousins?” The girl asked him in a slightly dominant tone.

“As soon as we finish.” Kili told her with a smile. “But you’re not only going to meet your cousins, but all the kids.”

“All the kids?” The sudden enthusiasm in the boy’s voice was catchy.

“There are many kids living here, most members of my mate’s family.” Kili told her.

“And where is your mate?” Aragorn’s careful question signalled he noticed way too much.

“He’s busy.” Kili cut it short. “So are you ready to meet the kids?” Kili knew the older boys would be now with Ori in the gardens, and the younger with Nori and a few servants were playing as well.

The tiny girl reached for his hand, and soon the boy took the other. “Can we go now?”

“Come, they should be in the garden.” Kili lead them wall in the right direction. He knew the palace like the back of his hand, and now he with ease guided them around.

“Ada!” The loud cry signalled he was seen, but as soon as Frerin saw two kids with Kili he stood on guard.

“Frerin, these are your cousins Eldarion and Elariel.” Kili introduced the kids. “This is my son Frerin.”

“Frerin could you take them to meet Frodo and Merry?” Kili gently suggested, and his growing boy did not disappoint he smiled a wide happy smile at the siblings and chatting away he showed them towards the other kids.

“He doesn’t look anything like you, but he’s like you.” Arwen’s words were prophetic.

“He’s a blessing.” Kili told her and slowly took her hand for support.

“Just a few more weeks?” Arwen asked with a radiant smile.

“Twelve.” Kili replied.

“You’re not happy.” Aragorn was straight forward.

“About my bonding? Not really. But I’m really happy with my family.” Kili told him firmly.

“So in a way you are happy.” Arwen cut the topic.

Soon they joined the kids and eventually Kili pulled Arwen aside.

“So fill me in...” Arwen demanded in a firm voice.

“Bilbo has given birth a few times too many, after the last...” Kili told her worried.

“How bad is it?” She insisted, but instead of answering Kili let Bilbo explain himself.

Arwen took her time, slowly examining the older omega. But she didn’t say much, until the examination was over.

“You shouldn’t have more children, it could be done using herbs or by an operation.” She suggested.

“What would be less straining?” Kili insisted.

“Herbs.” Arwen decided. “You’re too weak for an operation as you are now. We could go back to the topic if you gain more strength in the future.”

“Why is he so weak?” Kili asked her.

“Too many children in too short periods of time.” Arwen was grim. “I will make a list of vitamins and herbs you have to take, I’ll send medicine and instructions how to take it. You have to rest, and with time there is a chance you will feel better.”

“A chance?” Kili wasn’t happy at all to hear it.

“I have to be honest, this is not an easy case.” Arwen was firm.

“This is not the last case.” Kili pulled her towards Thorin. The old alpha was in the next room, sitting in a comfortable armchair and reading a book.

“Thorin Durin...” Arwen greeted him with a smile.

“An honour to have you here Arwen Rivendell Strider.” Thorin tried to stand up, but he had to sit back again with pain.

“How long has it been hurting?” Arwen sat down in front of him.

“A few years...” Thorin admitted.

“Any other symptoms?” She asked.

“He eats little, he has problems sleeping and he’s apathetic.” Kili told her when Thorin didn’t speak too proud and stubborn. “He’s weak and he gets tired easily.”

Arwen stared at Thorin and gently reached for his grey hair. “Pain in the chest?” She asked slowly. Thorin could only nod.

“I’ll make a special medicine for you. You need to eat less meat, sleep as long as possible. I will add a special medicine for sleep. You need to avoid any stress, spend time reading, with your spouse and your kids. Take things slowly, you won’t get any younger and any stress might make your condition much worse.” Arwen eventually told him. “It’s crucial you make sure he doesn’t have any difficulties, and I’m serious.” Arwen’s tone was grim once they left the room. “He’s lucky to be alive as it is.”

Kili just stared at her with fear in his eyes, Thorin’s death...

“There is one more person I’d like you to take a look at...” Kili admitted shyly. “And you might refuse... it’s a bit... but he’s dear to me...”

She inhaled deeply and slowly nodded.

“I’m just a servant...” Nori tried protesting.

“Sit down.” Arwen told him firmly. “So what’s wrong?”

“I’m not sure what happened...” Kili admitted.

“Do you trust me?” Arwen asked him. “Leave us alone please...”

“Nori... she’s the only one who can help you...” Kili held his friend and left swiftly.

When he was asked back in, a long time passed by. Nori was sitting there nervously playing with his clothes and Arwen had a strange smile.

“With this there is actually something I can do.” She smiled at Kili. “You will have to take the meds and have a tiny operation, but apart from that after a while your body should regain normal functions...”

Nori hearing that began crying as if the world ended.

“He’s scared of alphas...” Arwen whispered to Kili.

“No one will force you to anything...” Kili knew his friend would reject the treatment if it meant being sent back to the harem or mated forcefully. “I’m going to make sure you find happiness...”

“Only if my body starts working properly.” Nori dictated the condition.

“Only if you want to...” Kili held him tightly.


	6. Chapter 6

Arwen’s visit and the troubling news about Bilbo’s and Thorin’s condition made Kili feel extremely worried. He knew Thorin did his best to legally assure his position and give them all safety, but in reality it was unprecedented for an omega to gain such high rank. Kili saw the shock on many people’s faces when they saw an omega doing business. He noticed the surprise, but when they would hear he acted on Thorin’s behalf they never questioned it. But deep down Kili wondered when someone would ask about his mate.

A few people asked for Thorin, but Kili’s credentials stood, during important meetings Dwalin would stand by him. The older alpha was now a constant visitor and official he was still partially supervising the Ironhill inheritance. With time Kili began dragging both Frodo and Merry, the young teenagers were slowly maturing, and Kili decided to use them as a shield.

Slowly things were becoming stable, and as the last days came, Kili was ready for the third birth. But even he was surprised when it started with blood and pain. More pain than ever.

Once the servants got him to Oin’s office, and when eventually the doctor helped him pull the child out, Kili had lost lots of blood.

“It’s going to take a while for you to go back to your duties...” Oin told him slowly.

“I have to do my best...” Kili insisted and tried to get up.

“You will rest.” Thorin tried to sound strong. “I will try to find enough strength... Especially for my second alpha grandson.”

Kili wasn’t happy but there was nothing he could do.

“We all have priorities.” Thorin told him. “And it so happens we both have the same agenda.” He smiled.

“Try and not get stressed.” Kili insisted. “And take your meds!”

\-------

When Oin ran into the medical office, followed by a few servants and Thorin, Kili's heart froze.

“What’s going on?” Kili insisted.

“Your mate came in and made him nervous...” A servant explained.

“Help him!” Kili disregarding his own pain, got up and followed the doctor.

“Stay in bed, I’m going to do my best...” Oin told him firmly. But Kili wouldn’t, listen he stayed at Thorin’s side and held his hand firmly.

Oin and the medics were working relentlessly, they were doing anything possible to save him, but Kili felt the hand go weak in his hand.

“His heart failed him.” The old medic was depressed as he announced the death.

Kili felt the tears go down his face and neck but there was nothing anyone could do.

“Nori get my clothes.” He said in a grim tone, completely pushing away his own pain.

“You’re too weak...” Nori tried protesting.

“Get my clothes!” Kili spoke to him in a harsh tone, like never before. Immediately he realised he spoke to strongly to his best friend. “Please...” He added weakly.

Nori didn’t seem offended, more like spooked. “I’ll bring something...”

As soon as Kili got some proper clothes he sent out messages to Balin, Dwalin and Gandalf. He also wrote to Arwen worried about Bilbo.

“Kili... there is something strange going on in the main hall...” Nori complained to him.

“What do you mean?” Kili asked him slowly.

“Shelob... and your mate...” Nori told him.

Kili felt the fury come back, all the pain, loneliness and rejection came back tenfold. And later it was Thorin, his death and his legacy...

“What did they say to Thorin that caused the attack?” Kili asked him in a deadly tone.

“Something about Fili asserting his rights as heir and demanding a part of the palace for him and the bitch...” Nori mumbled, he saw the huge strength in his friend’s eyes and the anger followed by it.

The wicked and cruel smile on Kili’s lips was something he had never seen before.

“Call Frodo and Merry, I need them.” Kili told him, he knew there was no way he could face them alone.

\-------

Kili walked there calmly, the pain preventing any sudden moves. Merry and Frodo, both grim and angry were walking right behind him. “Keep my back.” He whispered to them. “I might be in power but I’m just an omega.”

“You’re not just an omega.” Frodo told him firmly. “So don’t start thinking of yourself like that.”

“We’re right by your side.” Merry assured him with his father’s strength and Bilbo’s assertiveness.

Once they walked in, the people in the main room froze. His mate was now sitting on the throne way above everyone else, the whore right next to him. The servants glared in a panic at Kili and back to his mate.

“Leave the room.” Kili spoke in a strong voice, and the servants trained by him did not fail to listen, each and every one rushed out in fear of his anger.

“How can this bitch order everyone around and they won’t listen to me?” The female omega pouted.

“Send her back to the harem.” Kili calmly told the guards. And he saw hesitation for the first time.

“You have no right!” She yelled at him in anger. She was the one pulling the strings, that was Kili’s immediate conclusion. The alpha sitting there was stunned so far, silent and dazed.

“Say something!” She nudged him fiercely.

“I promised her the South Wing.” He spoke for the first time.

“The South Wing belongs to Bilbo and your siblings.” Kili reminded him.

“It does?” The alpha seemed stunned. “So it cannot be given.” He decided.

“I want it!” She insisted.

“Send her back to the harem.” Merry repeated the order to the hesitating guards. His strong tone and resemblance to Thorin in that moment broke the charm. The guards rushed to grab the female omega.

“How dare you? Will you let them do this?” She yelled at the alpha.

“It’s my wish that she stays here.” The alpha told the guards, who began hesitating again.

“Your wishes do not play a role in this palace.” Kili told him calmly.

“What?” She screamed.

“On Thorin Durin’s behalf Kili is in charge of everything, and in case of his death he is regent for the next heir!” Frodo told them firmly.

The alpha’s blue eyes were wide in shock. “Death?” He mumbled.

“Thorin Durin has passed just two hours ago, due to your doing.” Kili did not take it easy. “You killed your own father, and as much it was the norm in the old days, in the new days it will not be treated lightly.”

“He died?” The alpha whispered again completely away from reality.

“He wasn’t suppose to get nervous about anything... but something you said made his heart fail. It’s as if you killed him with your own hands.” Frodo’s words were harsh. “I will never forgive you. You are not my brother any more.”

He stared in shock, but the omega began demanding something again. Asking questions about the next heir and the alpha’s rights to his heritage.

“Take her away or you’ll all be punished!” Kili didn’t want to take it any longer.

“Can I see him?” The alpha’s question seemed innocent, but both of his brothers became furious.

“You don’t deserve to even be at his funeral.” Merry grimaced in anger. “Stay in that stupid harem of yours and don’t you ever step out, because the next time I see you, I will kill you!”

Kili saw the look of disbelief in the alpha’s eyes, as if everything was beyond him, as if he didn’t know where he was or what was going on around him.

“Bofur!” He called one of the most faithful guards.

“Yes Sir?” The guard never questioned him, and contrary to most, he accepted his authority immediately.

“Take him to the North Wing, and make sure he’s alone.” Kili made a firm demand, to everyone’s surprise. He came closer to the guard and whispered. “Make sure he’s safe, he’s not acting normal.”

Bofur nodded and walked up to the alpha. Instead of dragging him by force or doing anything rash he began gently talking to him. Swaying him, and Kili’s suspicions about the guard’s intellect proved true.

Soon Kili began giving out orders for the funeral and for the naming ceremony.

He gazed at Nori and the other servants seriously. “From today I’m in charge, and if anyone has anything against this is the time to say something.”

“It’s not our role to criticise you...” Someone told him meekly.

“I want to keep order and control, and all of you are going to help me.” Kili demanded from them.

“Help you?” A tall poor looking servant looked at Kili startled.

“You’re going to be my eyes and ears, and I’ll see to it that all of you are safe and have regular meals, regular pay and safety.” Kili promised.

All the servants had no idea what to say.

“It’s going to work.” Nori’s whisper assured him he made the right decision.

\-------

The next day Kili sat in the main hall, and he was in control of everything and everyone. He limited the sums of money spent on the harem, something he could not do with Thorin’s supervision. He listed new rules for the guards, soldiers and guests, and officially he closed their access to the harem and to the servants.

He gave orders for the two ceremonies approaching and he made sure everything was in the order he wanted.

“You’ve done well.” Dwalin told him with a strange smile.

“I haven’t even begun...” Kili suddenly felt a bit weak.

“I’ll help you.” Dwalin took his arm and lead him to the medic ward. “You should be resting...”

“No time to rest...” Kili complained. “You used to train my mate and be close to him?”

“Used to is the proper tense.” Dwalin mumbled not really wanting to talk about it.

“I have a request.” Kili looked at him seriously.

“I’m afraid it’s a request I don’t want to hear.” Dwalin was grim.

“Bofur is taking care of my mate in the North Wing, and he’s going to try to isolate him from the harem. As much as I have little love and respect for him, I do not understand his behaviour. Spend some time with him please, and find out what’s going on with him. It’s been way too long for a typical rut.” Kili pleaded.

“You’re too good for this world...” Dwalin told him.

“If he abandons the harem, we’ll save lots of money.” Kili pointed out the immediately financial benefit.

“I’ll make time and visit him.” Dwalin promised.

\------

Kili spent the rest of the day with the kids and Bilbo. Hearing the bad news Bilbo became devastated and now Kili was terrified that it might have an impact on his health. So far he was crying all night and all day, the kids absolutely terrified with his condition.

“Will you keep your promise?” Bilbo held his hand strongly.

Kili wanted to lie down and sleep, he felt weak all day. But he had to endure.

“You’re the strongest omega I’ve ever met...” Bilbo whispered tenderly. “You’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.”

“I don’t feel strong at all.” Kili laid down next to him, just to embrace him.

“Have you chosen a name?” Bilbo asked him gently petting his hair.

“Thorin.” Kili whispered.

“He’d be happy and honoured.” Bilbo smiled gently.

“I know.” Kili inhaled deeply.

“Thank you...” Bilbo held his hand.

“Thank you...” Kili smiled.

“You’re going to need even more strength now.” Bilbo made him realise.

“That’s why I need you.” Kili whispered. “There is no way I can manage on my own...”

“I’m sorry to be such a disappointment.” Bilbo embraced him and continued crying.

\-------

“I’m going to be there for you.” Frodo warmly assured him. He was always very mature, but now despite being fourteen he seemed almost an adult.

Merry took it harder, the anger was oozing from him, and he was more emotional. “I’m going to be there too.” He tried to make a strong face.

“I’d like you to stay and overlook your father. He cannot be left alone, and he needs more support now.” Kili told him, finding a good solution for his worries about Bilbo.

Together with Frodo he began another difficult day. More and more people were arriving to pay their respects to the family, and Kili pushed Frodo to handle that. He had tones of internal financial matters to handle. Hundreds of letters to write and a billion tiny issues to decide about. Apart from that he was dealing with the harem, he had to give out orders to the guards and soldiers.

“You look tired.” Merry’s voice was full of worry. He looked tired as well, and his eyes were red from crying.

“Get Nori and Ori please...” Kili sat down feeling weak. “I want them to eat with us.”

Merry smiled a faint smile and rushed to get them.

Sitting down at the table with all the kids and Bilbo, gave Kili a sense of family. Something he always wanted, even if some were not blood related to him, they were all his family. He reached out to Ori who handed him tiny Thorin, and Kili could only smile.

“So what are you going to name him?” Frerin asked him embracing them both.

“Thorin.” Kili smiled at him.

“Grandpa would like that.” Frer whispered.

Merry immediately had tears in his eyes. “Indeed he would.” He embraced his nephew.

“In a way it’s as if he is still with us...” The talkative Pip noticed with emotion.

“I couldn’t agree more with you.” Frodo smiled a faint smile.

“We’re all going to eat dinner every day together.” Kili told them. “And breakfast and lunch.”

“We are?” Frer asked with hope in his eyes.

“I might be very busy, but I want to be close to all of you.” Kili confessed. “I need your support.”

“We’re going to be there.” Bilbo held his hand.

“You can count on us Daddy...” Frer held his other hand.

“Nori and Ori sit down!” Kili yelled at them, they tried to leave the private family meeting.

“You’re both family too.” Kili insisted pointing to the two empty chairs.

“We need you...” Dior embraced Ori with emotion.

“Thank you...” Nori flashed a shy smile and sat down.


	7. Chapter 7

Dwalin came into the hall looking tired and with a strange face.

As soon as Kili handled everything and everyone, the old alpha waited for everyone to leave.

“We need to talk in private.” Dwalin told him. It was a first, so far the alpha always made sure to keep the right protocol.

“What’s going on?” Kili asked him seriously.

“He’s... oblivious.” Dwalin told him slowly. “He has no connection with reality, like it didn’t reach him that Thorin’s dead, as if it didn’t reach him he’s doing something wrong about you, it’s as if... he doesn’t realise he has kids with you, that he has an alpha heir, that what he’s doing is insane...”

“Does he want to return to the harem?” Kili asked him slowly.

“He seems lonely... he did speak about it a few times, but as the days pass, he speaks about it more and more... as if he’s addicted.” Dwalin concluded.

“Addicted?” Kili caught the word.

Dwalin looked at him spooked.

“You think he’s addicted to Shelob? To the sex and attention?” Dwalin asked him quickly.

“I’m not sure.” Kili looked away. “I need to think.”

“I’m going to make sure he stays away from that rotten place, and you figure out how to get rid of her, without hurting him...” Dwalin pointed out.

“How many kids does he have in there?” Kili asked in a shaken voice.  “I stopped on five.”

Dwalin inhaled and looked away. “Twelve.”

“Age and sex?” Kili demanded.

“Three beta girls, four beta boys, and two omega girls and three omega boys.” Dwalin told him. “Age from seven to four months.”

“No alphas?” Kili demanded.

“No alphas.” Dwalin confirmed.

“How many does he have with her?” Kili asked him firmly.

“None.” Dwalin told him with a strange spark in his eyes.

“I need to think.” Kili repeated and walked out.

\-------

He sat down and swiftly began writing to Arwen. Finding the right words took time, but slowly he began describing all the strange symptoms. The prolonged rut, the lack of contact with reality. All the strange pieces not fitting together at all. The demand to go back to the harem.

He got up and looked out of the window, the kids were there in the garden with Nori and Ori. Safe, protected from the cruel world. Frodo and Merry were slowly growing and maturing, and slowly they were seeing the world as it was, but Kili wanted to protect them all.

He rang the bell and a servant rushed in.

“I want you to call in master Balin.” Kili spoke slowly. “I want all the kids to get a proper education.”

He continued looking out and thinking. “All the kids...” He whispered to himself.

He rang the bell again.

“Yes Sir?” The servant looked at him eagerly awaiting any order.

“Find me the most desperate harem omega in the whole harem... someone...” Kili tried to explain.

“Someone most screwed?” The servant found the right words.

“Exactly.” Kili told him.

He continued doing the paperwork, but his mind was elsewhere, so when they eventually brought the omega to him he was anxious.

She was a tiny thing, pretty and shy. And Kili’s sharp eyes immediately noticed the bruises on her arms. She was too slim, and her clothes looked a bit ragged no matter how hard she tried to keep it in order.

“So what’s your name?” He asked her slowly and immediately saw fear in her eyes.

“Are you the First Spouse?” The girl asked in a trembling voice.

“Yes.” Kili calmly confirmed. “What’s your name?”

“Jasmine...” The girl mumbled.

“I want to know everything.” Kili said it slowly, but he could still see the huge fear. “What did she do to you?”

She bit down on her lips. “If she finds out I talked to you she’s going to kill me...”

“You’re not going back in there.” Kili told her frankly.

“But she said...” The girl squirmed.

“Tell me.” Kili told her.

“She said you’re mean and you’re trying to get rid of all of us...” The girl squeaked.

“In a way... I’m planning to get rid of her.” Kili told her firmly. “I’m cleaning up.”

“No one can get rid of her.” The girl was terrified.

“Just wait and see.” Kili smiled an evil smile. “So tell me everything, what did she do, with whom.”

Soon the servants brought in some food, and Kili’s conclusions proved true. The harem limited everything for those less privileged. The girl ate like crazy, and when she looked up again, Kili saw the determination. And soon words began flowing, picturing a hell Kili had no idea about. A hell far worse than he could ever imagine. Far worse than what Nori described.

“You’re never going back there.” Kili assured her, and then he began his real interrogation. Drawing all the information he needed.

“So three of the kids do not have omega parents any more?” Kili asked.

“They died at childbirth...” The girl mumbled, and Kili’s nose immediately picked up a new difficult topic.

Kili stared at her. “So there is more?”

He saw her tremble, the huge fear and manipulation still lingering in her mind.

“She... hates those who get pregnant... and she...” She chocked.

“She did what?” Kili demanded.

“She beats them...” The girl gulped.

“How many kids would he have if she hadn’t hurt them?” Kili demanded.

She looked away, tears in her eyes. “Twenty five... or more...”

“I need a list.” Kili demanded.

“A list?” The girl whispered.

“Of all the people we can trust, and those we have to punish.” Kili told her firmly. “And a list of people to save.”

“Let’s start from those to save...” The girl was shy again, and slowly the three lists were growing, and to Kili’s horror those to punish was growing really long. Many omegas supported Shelob, was it out of fear or manipulation he did not know. Anyway they would all be punished. 

“Why do so many listen to her?” Kili asked slowly.

“They fear her...” The girl mumbled. “She’s mean and she’s ruling the whole place... he listens to her.”

“So we’d better keep him busy.” Kili decided. “Do you like kids?” He smiled gently.

“Kids?” The girl was stunned. “I don’t have any of my own...”

“Who takes care of those kids in the harem?” Kili suddenly asked feeling worried.

“No one?” The girl mumbled. “Especially those without parents... those with parents are also usually left alone. Most of them spend time trying to sway and please the alpha.”

“Why?” Kili asked firmly.

“You don’t understand what’s it like...” She mumbled.

“So make me understand.” Kili caused another wave of information.

Kili eventually called the servants and ordered to get her a comfortable room and dinner.

\--------

He knocked on the door to the North Wing and Bofur swiftly answered.

“How is he doing?” Kili demanded.

“Strange...” Bofur was puzzled.

“Define...” Kili insisted.

“He’s having problems focusing, he’s apprehensive and lost...” Bofur tried. “At times he demands being let out to the harem, on other days he acts as if he doesn’t even know who he is...”

“Is he bored?” Kili asked.

“He sleeps most of the time, and when he’s awake he’s very thirsty. He speaks a bit about how he misses his kids...” Bofur grimaced. “But he’s not talking about your kids...”

“I’m planning to get him busy... Have you met Nori?” Kili asked.

“The crazy bossy red head?” Bofur hissed.

“I’ll send you and my mate something to do, and Nori will supervise you.” Kili informed him.

“Bummer...” Bofur didn’t look happy at all.

“Make sure he doesn’t leave this part of the palace.” Kili told him. “I’m getting a doctor to come in and see him.”

“Finally a sane idea...” Bofur still didn’t look happy.

Later Kili rushed to the four servants he sent to the harem with a special mission.

“We have the first three... but they are... crying and a bit wild...” The servant was worried.

“Leave me with them.” Kili insisted and shooed them away. “Bring some food and juice.”

The servant nodded and rushed away, while Kili made a hesitant step inside.

The trio was sitting in the dark corner, all of them hiding.

Kili sat down on the floor and took in the sight. The oldest was four, and she had a strong fierce blue eyed glare. Her hair was a crazy red colour. The beta boy behind her was blond, but his eyes were a pale green. The third child had dark brown eyes and dark hair, just like Thorin. He was the smallest and the youngest. They were slim, a bit too slim. Their clothes were random and the wrong sizes, more like someone threw something at them.

Soon the door opened and the servant put the food next to Kili on the floor. Kili nodded at him and glanced back at the children.

Kili reached for the food and gently pushed a plate towards the kids.

“I’m Kili.” He decided to tell them. “And from today I’m going to be your dad.”

The girl’s eyes went narrow and suspicious. While the other two were glaring at the food greedily.

“Our dad?” She hissed. “We already have a dad.”

Kili flashed a smile. “I’m going to take care of you.”

“You’re going to kill us?” She hissed.

“No. The opposite. I’m going to make sure you’re all fine.” Kili explained. “What’s your name?”

“Liza.” She mumbled.

“And these are?” Kili asked.

“Jerry and Thay.” She hissed.

“By taking care of you I mean, I will make sure you are safe. That every day you will get good food and good care. You will be given clothes and toys, and books. You will be able to have fun, go to school and do many interesting things.” Kili promised.

“A safe place to sleep?” She hissed.

“A safe place to sleep.” Kili added. “This is for you.” He pushed the plate closer at them.

“Adults suck.” The girl hissed. “And cannot be trusted.”

“I’m going to be good to you.” Kili promised. “I have three boys of my own.”

“Do you hit them?” She hissed.

“Would you like to ask them yourself?” Kili smiled seeing a tiny gap in her defences. She nodded slowly.

Kili rang the bell.

“Get Frer and Dior.” He asked the servant.

It took a while, he tried talking to them, slowly gathering information.

“Daddy!” Dior rushed to his arms immediately thrilled to be let out of the South Wing.

Frer walked in quietly and sat down next to Kili and glanced at the kids in the corner.

“Who are they?” Frer demanded in his strong voice.

“Your sister and brothers.” Kili said the truth out loud. Frer’s eyes went narrow and he analysed the kids.

“Why are they so dirty, slim and ragged?” He pointed out quickly.

“Who is ragged you slimy overgrown jerk?!” Liza reacted immediately.

Frer just glared at her.

“That’s why I’m going to take care of them.” Kili told him.

Frer glared back at him and back to the kids.

“Like you don’t have too many kids to take care of already...” He growled. “How many more does he have?” His son proved to be as sharp as Kili.

“Twelve.” Kili was honest.

“Are you planning to take care of all of them?” Frer was grim.

“They are your brothers and sisters, so yes.” Kili was honest.

Frer glared back at the girl. “We need to feed them, wash them and get them some better clothes.” He decided.

“I was thinking exactly the same thing.” Kili gently embraced him.

“I’m Dior!” The younger more exuberant of the two rushed to the girl with his huge smile and open arms, and to everyone’s shock she let him embrace her.

“These are Liza, Jerry and Thay.” Kili told him.

“It’s going to be so fun to play together!” Dior announced.

“Play?” Liza asked him.

“We have lots of toys and we spent most of the day with our uncles and friends and we go out to the garden and we read books...” Dior began speaking with enthusiasm, something he got from Pip.

“Does he hit you?” She demanded in a firm voice.

“Hit us?” Dior was stunned. “Why would he?” He looked at her oblivious. “He loves us, so he would never hit us...”

“Do you get food every day?” She continued a fierce interrogation.

“At least five times a day.” Dior still didn’t get why she was asking about that. “And sometimes we get snacks and desserts and other stuff...”

Her eyes were wide and in shock.

“So your dad is fun?” She asked him slowly.

“Dad is the best! He’s the smartest and nicest person in the world!” Dior announced with all the sincerity in the world.

She gently unwrapped from his embrace and walked up to Frer and Kili. There was a strange kind of longing in her eyes, something that reminded Kili of Thorin in his worst days.

“You’re not going to send us back?” She pleaded.

“You’re never going to that place again...” Kili assured her warmly. “Are you hungry?” He passed her the plate.

She nodded slowly and sat down next to him, soon both boys followed her and all three were eating from one plate using their hands.

“No one is going to hurt you.” Frer suddenly said noticing the marks and bruises on their hands and legs. “We’re going to protect you.”

She gazed at him and slowly flashed a shy smile.

\------

Kili wanted to send the kids to Bofur and his mate, but it proved impossible. Instead the trio was now sleeping in his bed along with Frer, Dior, Pip, Gror and Fror. Among the friendly kids they felt safe and slowly Kili realised he had to pull out all the kids from the harem. Even those with parents.

“You’re too good for this world...” Bilbo embraced him.

“I’m trying to fix everything.” Kili mumbled.

“Just remember that not everything can be fixed.” Bilbo warned him seriously. “The older the kids, the harder it will be to civilise them and teach them.”

Kili nodded in agreement.

“But I’m going to try.” Kili told him.

“I bet you are.” Bilbo hugged him and walked to check on the younger kids. Kili followed him, Bilbo was getting tired and older, and the last days were difficult.

The next was going to be difficult for everyone. And there was no good way of preparing for it.

“I’m going to be there for you tomorrow.” Frodo’s warm voice was right behind him.

“Thank you...” Kili told him. “You’ve grown.”

“I had to.” Frodo wasn’t happy at all.

“He would have been proud of you.” Kili assured him.

“Tomorrow is the last goodbye, you should get some sleep.” Frodo gently told him. “The ship will sink without you.”

“You’re right.” Kili walked him to his room.

\-------

Kili hated the funeral, all the important people arrived and many were grieving. Some came just for the food, some just for the show. Kili made sure all the expectations were met.

“How is Bilbo holding on?” Gandalf asked him, the old man was really worried.

“Barely.” Kili whispered.

“Do you need more help?” Gandalf proposed.

“Can you conduct the naming ceremony?” Kili pleaded.

“How long ago did you give birth?” Gandalf realised. “It’s another alpha.”

“Five days ago.” Kili noticed in a tired voice.

“You should be resting.” Gandalf scolded him.

“Some things needed to be handled.” Kili grimaced.

“I’ll conduct the ceremony. When are you planning it?” Gandalf asked.

“Two weeks from now.” Kili told him.

“You can count on me.” Gandalf held his arm for the rest of the funeral, Frodo, Merry following close by.

\-------

As soon as the ceremony was over Kili rushed back to duties. Over the past days he came to many bizarre conclusions, and the condolence letter sent by Arwen stirred him.

‘...such symptoms can occur when taking some of the drugs based on belladonna. The herbs itself is toxic and lethal, but if someone were to measure the right doses it could be applied for a longer time. They used to use it in ancient medicine, but it was too dangerous and many people died due to therapy. Apart from being apathetic, oblivious to the surrounding environment, the side effects are prolonged sleep, extreme thirst, nausea, problems with memory and learning. It keeps the patient in a state of permanent daze, limiting their will, thinking and perception of reality. It used to be used to subdue violent alphas, making them more placid and agreeable. I would advise a withdrawal period, but in the case of an alpha, I have to warn you, it might cause huge stress and aggression. It might take anything from a few weeks to many months for the body to reject the drug and return back to normal...’

She later gave a long list of extra medicine to give to help reduce the effects of the drugs and withdrawal, but Kili kept thinking how to do the withdrawal without engaging the alpha.

He called in Dwalin and gave him Arwen’s letter.

“You really think this is true?” Dwalin was grim.

“It’s a logical explanation.” Kili mumbled.

“The question is who gave him the drug...” Dwalin glared at him.

“I know who. The real question is how to punish her and keep him away from her.” Kili told him.

“You have full power, and now that he’s away from the harem, you may make changes.” Dwalin pointed out. “Do you need my help handling that?”

“I have no idea what to do with them.” Kili looked away.

“Keep the kids, sell everyone else.” Dwalin suggested.

“Now, that’s the real problem. I don’t want to sell anyone.” Kili grimaced.

Dwalin looked at him sternly. “You wanted my advice so hear me out. Sell those who caused problems, make sure they land in the right hands.”

“Right hands?” Kili glared at him.

“I have a right buyer in mind.” Dwalin had a strange smirk on his face. “Liberate the others, do something one of Thorin’s ancestors did. He let his most trusted soldiers and friends chose a spouse among the selected omega. It was done in a traditional courting with the approval of both sides.”

“That’s ingenious!” Kili felt relief, the idea was good and it was plausible. “Does that mean you want to go fishing in our harem?” He noticed wittily.

“Actually female omegas don’t work for me.” Dwalin confessed going all red.

But Kili continued glaring at him with narrow eyes.

\-------

“You’ve done a revolution.” Balin was beaming pride as they sat down to sort out a few most complicated things together. “But beware, your mate might not be happy with the changes you’ve done.”

“I’m in charge of the fortune.” Kili stood strong.

“You are. But he’s your mate, and the last thing you need is to enrage him.” Balin suggested.

“I’m keeping him locked up.” Kili confessed and saw pure shock on his mentor’s face.

“Well I’ll be damned...” The old omega chuckled.

“So will you help me with the sales and courtship?” Kili begged.

“I’m right here if you need me.” The old omega assured him, but there was a sharp merry spark in his eyes. “Can’t wait to see the show from the front row.”

Kili just laughed.

“I’ve always known you’d do a lot of crazy things, but you’ve gone beyond my imagination.” Balin was really pleased. “I couldn’t be more proud.”

“I need a solution for the older kids.” Kili was grim. He evaluated all the twelve kids now, and as much as those orphans adapted quickly, half of the others were insufferable. Spoilt beyond measure, egocentric, and annoying. They never had proper guardianship, they did not know rules or manners at all. They were taught to speak back and assert their position with aggression and sometimes violence. Some of the younger were cute and sweet, some were rascals, but they weren’t horrible or hopeless.

So far the more reasonable kids were in the South Wing, under Ori’s and Bilbo’s care, but Kili sent those horrible ones to Bofur to stay under their father’s and Nori’s care. Nori was downright pissed, but Kili made him realise he had to do something with the kids. Nori became double pissed when he eventually met Bofur, but his anger made the kids fear him immediately.

“Those brats are horrible... who spoiled them so much?” Dwalin came in and sat down holding his head in his hands.

“My mate and their omega parents.” Kili was calm.

“Fucking fantastic... that girl...” Dwalin hissed.

“Izuna?”Kili immediately knew who he meant. She was a tiny omega, with golden hair and blue eyes, she wore the most fancy dresses and her expectations were unrealistic. She was everything her omega mother was, flimsy, dramatic and demanding.

“Send them to school.” Balin told him calmly. “A change of environment would do them good.”

“Make sure they have no contact with their omega parents.” Dwalin added.

“A school is actually a good idea.” Kili smiled with relief. “I’ve gotten rid of almost all the harem omegas.”

“I’ll get you a good school, or a few good teachers if you decide to home school them.” Balin smiled.

“Thank you! I would die without you!” Kili finally had a concept.

“Some are a bit too young...” Balin made him realise.

“I know what I’m going to do.” Kili suddenly had an idea.

“He’s scary when he’s like that...” Dwalin smiled to his brother as Kili ran out the door in a hurry.

\-------

Kili rushed into the North Wing with all his energy.

“What the...” Nori grimaced seeing him.

“Where are they?” Kili shot a question.

“In there...” Nori was grim.

“Where is he?” Kili demanded.

“Asleep. He sleeps really a lot.” Nori complained.

“Good.” Kili’s eyes were screaming determination.

“Do not disturb me, no matter what you hear.” Kili’s eyes spoke evil.

“Yes, Sir...” Nori mumbled, never seeing his friend like that before.

As soon as Kili got in he looked at servants sternly.

“Leave us.” He told them firmly, and all four looked happy to be able to get out.

“Sit down all of you!” He spoke to the kids in a firm tone, unlike anyone before. He saw shock on their faces, especially Izuna was ready to protest.

“I said sit down.” He repeated firmly.

“Who are you to tell us what to do!” Izuna blew up like a grenade.

“You are...” One of the boys noticed in fear. Kili knew his name was Ryo, Nori gave him a list of all the kids, and only one had black hair and golden eyes.

“He’s...” Another child Kili did not recognise whispered.

“The First Spouse, and so what!” Izuna stomped her foot.

“They say...” One of the kids realised in fear.

“I decide about everything here.” Kili told them firmly. “I rule both the money and the palace.”

“So what! Mommy said you’re just another bitch! I don’t have to listen to you!” Izuna was furious.

“Mommy is not here, isn’t she?” Kili taunted the child with ease.

The girl looked at him spooked.

“I’ll tell daddy and he’ll call for her!” She insisted.

“She’s not coming back. You can try talking to your dad, but still I’m the one deciding about everything in here.” Kili spoke calmly.

Izuna began crying, but Kili did not give a shit. It wouldn’t work on him.

“You want to get rid of us?” A dark haired boy with Thorin’s blue eyes asked him.

“No. But I’m not going to tolerate any nonsense.” Kili was strong. “Either you start behaving like members of this family, or you will be removed from the palace.”

“Removed?” A girl asked with fear. “You mean sold?”

Kili grimaced, the analogy was typical, omegas were sold off by their families.

“No. I’m not planning to sell any of you.” Kili told them.

“If we anger Daddy he might sell us...” A boy noticed in fear.

“No, he will not.” Kili spoke with flare. “I’m the person in charge!”

“You’re more powerful than daddy?” She asked with huge terrified eyes.

“Yes.” Kili was grim. “And I’m the person deciding your fate.”

“You want to get rid of us.” Izuna looked at him sternly.

“You’re all spoiled brats with no idea about reality!” Kili hissed at them. “Unless you learn the rules around here, I will have to send you away.”

“Get rid of us...” Izuna repeated tears forming in her eyes.

“I was thinking more about school.” Kili made her realise.

“School?” She hissed. “Why would we want to go to school?”

Kili suddenly felt helpless.

“To have a good life?” Kili suggested.

“A good life?” She hissed with anger.

Kili just glared at her.

The knock on the door surprised them both, all the kids glared at the door with fear.

“Nori sent me.” Frer was standing in the doorway.

“Come in, please.” Kili tried to hide his emotion.

“Who is this?” Izuna glared at him, they were practically the same age.

“I’m Frerin.” Frer stood strong. He was the only alpha in the room, and he was more or less consciously using the natural advantage he had over all of them. The omegas moved away, and most betas seemed to be uncomfortable.

“You’re the heir?” Izuna asked with tears in her eyes.

“I’m the heir.” Frer didn’t care about her emotional state at all, he glared at all the kids. “So these are the ones meant to be sent away?”

“There is little that can be done.” Kili gently told him. “They do not want to be a part of the family, they do not respect the rules.”

Frer eyed them all again. “You have more than enough kids to take care of, why waste time on them?”

“They deserve one last chance.” Kili tried to show his more considerate side.

“You’re too good for this world.” His down to earth son glared from him to the kids. “You can’t save them all... they are misbehaving, disrespectful and ill-mannered. We’ve got tones of problems even with those nicer ones you pulled out of the trashy harem.”

“We won’t cause any problems!” One of the kids yelped.

“We can be nice!” Another seemed terrified with the perspective.

“We will obey the rules...” Izuna’s voice was full of terror and he eyes were full of fear.

“If you don’t, I will personally see you all punished.” Frer kept a cold face, but Kili could see the light of triumph in his deep blue eyes.

“You look just like daddy...” One of the younger kids noticed meekly.

“Who cares...” Now that was one topic Frerin was not willing to discuss at all. “Are we taking them with us?”

“I think we should, but first we need to explain the rules.” Kili sat down on the door, his son right next to him.

\-------

“So these are the other kids?” Bilbo greeted them with a smile. “You’re so cute!” He smiled at Izuna. “Come and meet everyone!”

Those who came into the South Wing first were now looking apprehensive at Izuna and the other trouble makers, but with the three alphas present the kids tried to behave.

“It’s so cool to have so many kids here!” Pip was all enthusiasm. “We’re going to have so much fun together! We’re going to be like a super powerful clan!”

“We have the same hair!” Dior was thrilled as he touched Izuna’s hair gently.

“You’re very pretty...” She mumbled trying to be polite.

“So now we have twenty one kids?” Ori was happy to see them all come in. “We can start a school here!”

“Twenty one?” Izuna asked Dior.

“Fifteen of us, and our six uncles.” Dior told her gently.

“And Frerin is the heir...” She hissed.

“Brother is just like dad.” Dior told her warmly.

“And your dad is?” She demanded.

“The First Spouse.” Dior smiled, but she just blushed and looked away.

“That’s just great...” She hissed, but Dior just smiled at her, making her smile back.


	8. Chapter 8

Fili awoke up with a huge headache, somehow he had the crazy feeling that his head had been hurting for ages. He gazed at the ceiling not really knowing where he was or what he was doing there. Everything was just a blur. A strange mixture of random scenes, images and random people. He had a huge feeling something was missing, like a huge fragment of a puzzle was torn out from the middle and he was left with unfitting scarps.

“How are you feeling today?” Bofur’s cheerful voice was irritatingly cheerful.

“I’m hungry.” Fili complained to his guard and friend. One of the few people always near him.

“That’s good! I got something special for you!” Bofur smiled and placed an elegant tray. Somehow he realised his friend was doing it every morning himself, no servants roaming about.

“Thank you...” Fili told him and reached for the tea.

“This tea tastes strange.” He complained.

“It’s for the headaches.” Bofur smiled. “Some kind of special mix, I’ve rather learnt to like it.” He drank the same thing, assuring Fili it was safe.

“You always think of everything!” Fili smiled.

“Someone has to!” Bofur grinned like crazy and began eating. “Dwalin is going to drop by today.”

“Great! I’d like to spar with him a bit, it’s been ages since I last saw him!” Fili felt happy, but the sparks died in Bofur’s eyes. As if he was disappointed yet again.

“Too bad Dad doesn’t have time to visit anymore... he’s always so busy...” Fili complained a bit, but the shade in Bofur’s eyes was even more bitter now.

“We’ll go and visit him.” Bofur suddenly declared.

“We could?” Fili somehow couldn’t shake the feeling he was a prisoner in his own home.

“I’ll arrange it.” Bofur suddenly seemed old and tired. Older than they really were.

When Fili went to bathroom he looked at himself in the mirror. “I look old too...” He realised in terror.

The clothes did not look like the clothes he liked best. And the size was different than he remembered. This wasn’t his room in the South Wing, nor the room he saw often in his dreams.

“Are you ready?” Bofur asked him calmly. His friend seemed even older now, three guards were walking with them, as Bofur lead the way.

“Aren’t we going to the main hall?” Fili asked as they took a turn.

“Your father isn’t in the main hall.” Bofur scolded him in a tone Fili had never heard before.

“Where is he?” Fili asked.

“I’ll show you.” Bofur continued walking. Fili’s heart fell when they walked into the crypt.

“You can’t be serious?” Fili hissed.

“You can’t be serious that you don’t remember...” Bofur pointed to the tombstone.

With huge disbelief Fili read the sign, just like he had so many times in his dreams.

“I hope this is the last time you forget you killed your own father.” Bofur’s words were full of anger. “I’d hate to have to bring you here again...”

Fili saw the tears in his friend’s eyes. “How could I forget?”

“I have no idea... but you keep forgetting about all the important stuff a lot...” Bofur seemed more tired than he was angry.

“Like?” Fili asked.

“Like your family, your brothers, your own children...” Bofur seemed defeated, as if they had the same conversation many times before.

Fili was immediately flooded by images of two cute little boys, one with golden hair and one with dark hair. Frodo and Merry. And then it was... A beautiful girl with golden hair and bright blue eyes.

“Do you think we could see Frodo or Merry? Or Izuna?” Fili was eager to see them, but Bofur looked even more tired.

“I doubt Frodo and Merry have time, but I could call for Izuna.” Bofur looked away and began walking back towards their rooms.

\------

“Daddy!” She was beaming energy and happiness. His little ray of light. With ease he lifted her and swayed her around, just like when she was a tiny girl.

“I’m so happy you have time to see me!” She sat in his lap and began chatting away, which wasn’t really like her. “I was scared when I was moved to the South Wing, but it’s not bad at all! I have lots of kids to play with and I can read!” She said with triumph. “Our teacher said I’m really bright and that if I learn hard I might became a scholar one day.”

Fili had no idea why his tiny girl wanted to be a scholar in the first place but it didn’t sound bad at all.

“Did you make some new friends?” He asked her.

“Frer hates me, but I absolutely adore Dior! He’s the best! He’s so beautiful, kind and so fun! His hair is even nicer than mine is!” She began chatting again. “We often play together, and he showed me many good books to read!”

“Is he also dreaming of becoming a scholar?” Fili asked gently.

“No! He wants to be a medic! Like the members of the Rivendell family!” She declared.

“That’s impressive!” Fili gently patted her beautiful hair.

“How do you like my new dress?” She got up and twirled around. “I chose it myself! It was a reward!”

“A reward?” Fili asked her.

“From the First Spouse!” She was thrilled beyond measure. “I proved that I can be responsible and I helped with the younger kids!”

“I’m glad you’re happy.” He gently told her.

“At first I was terrified he was going to sell me, just like he got rid of mommy, but he’s not that bad...” She confessed. “I like it in the South Wing.”

“I’m glad.” Fili had no idea what to say or what she was talking about.

“Why don’t you ask for the other kids? Why don’t you come and visit us?” She pleaded.

Fili saw no reason to ask for kids, especially those who weren’t his, but he was fairly certain he wasn’t allowed to go out for some bizarre reason.

“If I have time.” He made a safe promise.

“I’d love to spend more time with you!” She smiled before going away.

\-------

“I brought something for you.” Dwalin sat down. He looked really old and tired, and Fili was stuck with an odd feeling again.

“It’s empty...” He realised opening the book.

“Write down whatever you want... your memories, your dreams, your thoughts...” Dwalin suggested. “It might help you patch it all back together again.”

“Patch up what?” Fili hissed.

“What’s left of your life...” Dwalin wasn’t friendly at all, his old mentor suddenly was intimidating.

“My life?” Fili whispered.

“Look around you... you’re all alone... I come here not because I want to... Bofur is here not because he wants to be...” Dwalin was cold.

“Why are you here then?” Fili felt puzzled and lost.

“Because someone I love and respect asked me to check on you as often as I can spare the time.” Dwalin looked out the window.

“What did I do that you hate me so much?” Fili whispered.

“Now that’s something you have to try to remember by yourself!” Dwalin pushed the book more at him. “You have no idea how many people you’ve hurt, how many hate you... and I have no idea if you’re even able to comprehend and try to fix it all. But for your father’s sake at least try!”

“Bofur said... he said I killed him.” Fili felt broken.

“You did... You abandoned your family in the most difficult of times, and you showed disrespect to your father in a time when his health was declining... your words and actions killed him. His heart failed.” Dwalin stood up strong. “I will always hate you for that. Your brothers hate you for the very same reason.”

Fili glared at him trying to choke it all down. The sudden feeling of tears falling down his face surprised him.

“He’s really gone?” Fili whispered. “So I have to go and handle everything... the family fortune... everything...” He suddenly remembered all the duties connected with his family.

“It’s being handled by more competent hands.” Dwalin told him.

“Are you and Balin doing it?” Fili looked at him with hope, he trusted Dwalin even if Dwalin had bitter feelings towards him, he would never...

“No. Someone more competent.” Dwalin shrugged.

“Bilbo?” Fili remembered Thorin’s Second Spouse, he handled a lot of the business.

“Bilbo is unwell, your father’s death ruined him.” Dwalin broke his hopes.

“I should go and help out... I’ve been taught how to...” Fili tried to tell him.

“You are not to touch anything. You are not allowed to do anything concerning any financial or legal matters.” Dwalin was cold.

“On whose decision?” Fili grimaced feeling the anger wake up.

“Your father’s.” Dwalin flashed a grim smile.

“But if he died... that means I inherited the fortune and I need to take care of it...” Fili suddenly realised.

“You did not. You did not inherit anything. Legally speaking you’re just a guest in this house, staying due to the good will of the current owner. However I must admit the mal emotions of the current owner towards you might bring a change of that situation in the future.” Dwalin was grim.

“Current owner? Certainly my brothers do not plan to disinherit me...” Fili mumbled.

“Your eldest alpha son is the owner of everything.” Dwalin smirked. “And he hates you, thoroughly and absolutely. Especially after meeting all your other kids...”

“My kids?” Fili mumbled. He tried to remember but he couldn’t. Thinking of his kids only Izuna came to his mind, he did not recall having any other kids at all...

“You’re hopeless... I’ll come back next week.” Dwalin was angry again. “Try to remember and write it down.” He insisted.

\--------

Fili laid on the bed staring at the ceiling. He tried to remember but apart from random scenes nothing was coming back to him.

He rapidly sat up and pulled the empty book closer. Maybe if he wrote it all down... maybe it would all fall back into place. But he had no idea where to even begin.

Suddenly he remembered two huge black eyes glaring at him. But the emotion in those eyes was changing. First it was hope. Later it was fear and finally it was hate. There was a flash when those eyes were warm and caring, but then again it was anger and disappointment.

He suddenly remembered the last time he consciously saw his father.

‘Your spouse is in heat. It’s your duty.’ Thorin’s words rang in his head.

“So I have a spouse and it’s a male omega.” Fili said it out loud and again those pitch black eyes haunted him. He mind was flooded with a tender scent, and it was the most divine scent ever. His heart flustered and began beating like crazy, he just wanted to inhaled it again...

‘Why don’t you leave the harem and come and stay with me?’ Those eyes were full of desperation as the deep thrilling voice said the line.

“The harem?” Fili’s brows crossed. If he had such a sexy and lustful spouse, why was he using the harem? Suddenly his mind was flooded with scenes of sex, endless scenes of sex. Warm hands on his body, warm words whispered to his ears.

“How many kids do I have?” Fili asked the question immediately after Bofur arrived with breakfast.

Bofur just glared at him and didn’t answer.

“What’s going on with the harem?” He asked when eventually he didn’t get an answer.

“There is no harem any more.” Bofur had a strange smirk on his face. “There is no need for it any more.”

“What happened to all the omegas there?” Fili had a strange feeling of anger in his heart, but it was more like anger towards those manipulative omegas there.

“Most were freed and mated. Some were sold.” Bofur began eating, letting him take in the information.

“Is it true my alpha son became Thorin’s heir?” Fili asked the question bothering him.

“And your First Spouse is the Regent? Yes, it’s all true.” Bofur calmly poured the tea.

“I hate this tea...” Fili complained.

“It might be finally working so you’re going to be drinking more of it.” Bofur was firm.

“What’s this tea for?” Fili suddenly needed the answer.

“For many things... but it’s one of the long term treatments for the drugs you’ve been taking all these years.” Bofur told him.

“Drugs?” Fili mumbled, suddenly his world crashing down on his shoulders.

“That’s why some of the omegas were sold, not liberated. They kept you drugged for years...” Bofur calmly told him.

“What are the side effects?” Fili felt angry.

“The list is huge... mainly no contact with reality, placidness, no will, memory loss, sleepiness, extreme thirst... You’re finally losing some of them, but the drug will be in your body for many years to come, so get used to the tea.” Bofur told him.

“So they manipulated me?” Fili hissed.

“For years.” Bofur added that last meaningful part.

“How long?” Fili whispered.

“How long what?” Bofur asked for clarification.

“How old is my eldest alpha heir?” Fili remembered there was a boy considered his heir.

“He’s almost eight.” Bofur told him calmly.

Fili looked down on his hands.

“How old am I?” Fili looked at him in terror.

“You’re thirty four.” Bofur told him the truth.

“So I large part of my life was stolen from me...” Fili felt tears come up to his eyes again.

“You can say that.” Bofur passed him the tea. “Drink more tea, it’s washing out the poison from your body.”

“How old is Frodo now?” Fili asked.

“He’s fifteen.” Bofur made him realise.

“I lost my life...” Fili mumbled.

“So try writing... maybe it will help you add it all up.” Bofur was kind as always.

“Dwalin said you hate me.” Fili pointed out.

“I did... but when it turned out you were being drugged and poisoned... it wasn’t your fault.” Bofur told him the truth.

“Do you think... could I see my spouse?” Fili suggested.

“He’s really busy... and I’m seriously saying really busy.” Bofur told him firmly. “He barely has time for the youngest, and still he has to work every day, and take care of all the kids...”

“You admire him?” Fili realised.

“He’s special... He had to face you and the whore drugging you, Thorin’s death, and a difficult birth all the same day. And he managed it all, disregarding the huge pain.” Bofur spoke in awe. “He’s your opposite.”

“Opposite?” Fili whispered.

“Selfless. Always thinking of others. I know no other spouse who would even consider raising their mate’s bastard children, I know no other omega capable of running the biggest fortune ever, and according to Dwalin’s words, he’s making it flourish.” Bofur spoke in admiration.

“You love him?” Fili suddenly realised.

“It’s like more admiring a God on Earth.” Bofur grinned.

Fili glared at him, and the need to see those deep dark eyes filled him again.

“Can I see him?” Fili asked slowly.

“I’ll send a message, but I can’t promise anything.” Bofur was calm.

“I’d like to see Izuna again if possible.” Fili mumbled.

“She’s probably learning, she’s a bright one.” Bofur told him.

“And Dior...” Fili suddenly remembered the name Izuna said.

Bofur glanced at him surprised. “I’ll see what can be done.” It was the first time he showed interest in other kids than Izuna, and asking for Dior...


	9. Chapter 9

Fili laid back and felt his eyes failing him. He felt sleepy and tired for no apparent reason. He had to remember to ask Bofur for the name of the drug and a book about it. With difficulty he wrote it down and rested.

_‘We’re going to rule the world together...’ She had snakelike green eyes and deep black hair. Her hand was caressing his naked chest, and she was also naked..._

_‘I’m going to make you the strongest ruler ever... and we’re going to live in luxury...’ Her voice continued. ‘Drink this, it will help you have a peaceful sleep...’_

Fili awoke with a strange feeling in his chest. He was chocking, but it wasn’t mechanical, it was psychological. He felt like running and panicking. He let them... The anger in his heart was overwhelming.

He sat up and pulled the book closer, and finally he began writing.

\-------

“Good morning!” Bofur’s cheerful voice broke his focus on the book.

“Good morning!” Fili was ready for the regular questions, and now he knew it was Bofur’s way of testing if he was getting better.

From the friendly smile he could tell the answers finally were correct.

“I asked your spouse, but he said he doesn’t have time now, but he did agree for Izuna and Dior to visit you the day after tomorrow.” Bofur dropped the good news with triumph.

“Thank you.” Fili felt the need to tell him. “Thank you for everything...” He added.

“Can you get me a book about the drug they gave me?” Fili asked him in the middle of breakfast.

“I’ll get you both the books and the letters about it from the Rivendell medic.” Bofur smiled.

“Rivendell medic?” Fili tried to hide the shock. His family never talked to the Rivendells, the huge conflict lasted the last five centuries.

“It turned out your spouse is related to them and Arwen Rivendell Strider has been helpful with both your father’s health, Bilbo and you.” Bofur told him frankly. “She’s really nice, she visits from time to time.”

“I’d like to talk to her in person if she arrives again.” Fili whispered. “I want to understand what’s going on with me...”

“I’ll let him know.” Bofur nodded. But Fili became suspicious of the role of his spouse in all this. He was not only controlling him, keeping him a prisoner, but he took all the fortune and sold the harem without Fili’s consent.

“Do you feel lonely?” Bofur’s question surprised him.

“More like lost and locked in...” Fili complained.

“I was thinking... maybe we could take my brother and go sparring in the old training grounds?” Bofur suggested.

“Old training grounds?” Fili looked at him puzzled.

“Your father built a new one closer to the gardens for your brothers to use, but the old one is vacant.” Bofur told him. “You would feel better if he were back in shape.”

Fili looked at himself critically, his body was far from the well trained muscular form he used to have. He couldn’t remember the last time he trained.

“Who is training my brothers?” He shot.

“Dwalin, sometimes my brother.” Bofur told him calmly. “Frodo and Merry aren’t born fighters, they take more after Bilbo, but your son is growing quite fierce.”

“My son?” Fili asked.

“Your heir.” Bofur clarified. “The one you have no memory about, the one you ignored all his life, and the one who hates you most.”

Fili looked away hearing the bitter words.

“What’s he like?” He finally mumbled.

“Nothing like you, thank Mahal. He’s his omega father’s copy. Strong, smart and responsible. He also takes all the bad things from both of you, he’s quick tempered, dominant and stubborn as Thorin.” Bofur described the child Fili had no recollection of.

“So my spouse does have bad traits?” He caught the unexpected information.

“He can be scary! Too bad you don’t remember how he put you and that snake in your places!” Bofur beamed. “He made all your kids listen to him, and all the guards fear his wrath.”

“So he’s the keeping me prisoner?”  Fili growled all the anger now directed to his spouse.

Bofur just laughed. “He’s the one who isolated you from the whores and began your treatment. If he really wanted to isolate you and keep you prisoner, he would keep you on those damn drugs.” Bofur made him realise. “Although one of the side effects of withdrawal is anger, so I’m happy you feel angry. It’s progress.”

“Damn them... damn them all to hell...” Fili felt overwhelming anger.

“They are in hell. Dwalin made sure of that.” Bofur was calm.

“What do you mean?” Fili looked at him, he could feel the rage still in his blood.

“They were sold to the most appropriate buyer.” Bofur chuckled evilly. “From what I’ve heard Shelob died soon after arriving there.”

“Will I always be a prisoner?” Fili demanded.

“I seriously doubt that.” Bofur smiled gently. “You’re being kept here until you gain balance, later we’ll discuss it with your spouse.”

“So again everything is in his hands...” Fili hissed.

“Don’t contempt him. He’s the one keeping this ship aloft without him... I dread to think what would happen.” Bofur kept to his opinion.

\-------

Later in the afternoon Bofur brought in lunch and the books.

“I suggest starting from the letters.” Bofur told him. “They explain it in a more comprehensive way.”

“Thank you...” Fili immediately reached for the first letter, no willing to wait a moment longer.

‘Dear brother, I’m glad to hear you’re managing with the difficult situation you are in...’ The letter began on a more personal note. It was wishes and hopes about kids... Kids Fili had no idea about.

‘...such symptoms can occur when taking some of the drugs based on belladonna. The herbs itself is toxic and lethal, but if someone were to measure the right doses it could be applied for a longer time. They used to use it in ancient medicine, but it was too dangerous and many people died due to therapy. Apart from being apathetic, oblivious to the surrounding environment, the side effects are prolonged sleep, extreme thirst, nausea, problems with memory and learning. It keeps the patient in a state of permanent daze, limiting their will, thinking and perception of reality. It used to be used to subdue violent alphas, making them more placid and agreeable. I would advise a withdrawal period, but in the case of an alpha, I have to warn you, it might cause huge stress and aggression. It might take anything from a few weeks to many months for the body to reject the drug and return back to normal...’

Later Fili read the descriptions of drugs and medication, and how to prepare the withdrawal.

The books confirmed every single word. And Fili grunted angrily, it all seemed true. He was dazed, he had problems with thirst and nausea. All the symptoms matched.

However weeks, months, or years being locked up for the withdrawal irritated him.

\------

“Bofur said you’re finally making some progress.” Dwalin arrived late in the evening.

“Someone got you good...” Fili noticed the fresh wounds on his arm.

“I’m a bit too old to train younglings... especially those with your skills and his brain... that kid is going to be the death of me...” Dwalin complained but he seemed pleased nonetheless.

“His brain?” Fili hissed.

“He has an idiot alpha father, so well I guess everything making sense in his head is from the omega parent.” Dwalin laughed. “He’s just like Thorin.” He smiled.

“He hates me...” Fili grunted.

“There is no surprise in that. After everything you did to him, to his only real parent... well it’s at least positive that he’s not trying to kill all the other kids you have. Many alphas did that in the old days, especially with bastard harem kids...” Dwalin made him realise. “He doesn’t like most of them, but he’s not hurting them in any way.”

“Izuna?” Fili whispered.

“That fucking annoying brat?” Dwalin hissed. “She’s difficult to like...”

“But she’s so sweet...” Fili mumbled.

“Spoiled and egocentric. She’s slowly changing but it’s a long process. Most people hate her.” Dwalin made him realise.

“My perception of her is distorted?” Fili realised.

“Your perception of everything is fucked up.” Dwalin clarified.

“Will you fix it?” Fili taunted him just like in the old days.

“I’m going to try.” Dwalin was in a good mood. “Bofur said you want to start training, so tomorrow at seven?” He proposed.

“Tomorrow Izuna is going to visit...” Fili mumbled not sure if he should mention Dior. He wasn’t sure Dior was his child at all. “And she’s coming with Dior...” He added seeing the sharp analytical glare.

“They will come to meet you at lunch. We have enough time.” Dwalin assured him with a smile.

“That sounds fine...” Fili whispered in defeat. Trusting Dwalin and Bofur was the only thing he had left.

\------

Fili felt dead tired, but the idea that he was meeting Izuna and the mysterious Dior chased all his sleepiness away. He rushed to the bathroom, feeling alive, truly really alive for the first time in years.

“I’m glad to see you in a good mood.” Bofur began setting the table.

“Are you joining us?” Fili asked worried.

“I’m going to hang around.” Bofur smiled, but Fili immediately knew why. Somehow he knew. Meeting this child might stir him and Bofur was to make sure nothing bad would happen.

“Thank you.” Fili mumbled.

“No problem!” Bofur quickly got everything ready.

“Daddy, may we come in?” Izuna’s voice sounded from the doorway.

“I’m done! Have fun kids and if you need anything I’ll be in the room next door!” Bofur greeted both of them.

“Thank you!” A voice with a nice deep ring responded.

Seeing him Fili’s heart fell. He was... gorgeous. Even more beautiful than Izuna. He had long golden slightly curly hair. He was tall and slim, with some kind of willowy grace. But the real treat were the eyes, pitch black and mysterious. Thinking about it he was full of doubt, he doubted that this child was his, especially since he didn’t remember him. He doubted his spouse and his fidelity... But now staring the this child he immediately knew.

“It’s so good to see you Daddy!” Izuna broke the silence and rushed to him. “This is Dior!” She pulled the boy along.

On instinct Fili lifted both of them and crashed them into his chest. The boy went stiff, but the scent... spoke volumes.

“I’m glad to finally meet you...” He whispered to the boy, and then he felt those tiny hands rest on his shoulders and his heart melted.

“Let’s sit down and eat before the food goes cold.” He didn’t let go of them, instead he kept them in his lap all the time, just like he always did with Izuna.

The boy was shy, and he didn’t speak much, but those deep dark eyes were glaring at Fili, drilling a hole in his head.

“What do you like best?” He gently asked the boy.

“The fish please...” The boy mumbled.

“Here you are...” Fili fed him like a little child, and those dark eyes seemed surprised to say the least.

“Daddy is the best, isn’t he?” Izuna asked the boy.

“I guess he’s okay...” The boy mumbled, but didn’t sound certain at all.

Fili let them sit on the chairs next to him, and he saw a tender smile on Izuna’s face. Soon she began chatting away like during all their meetings, she talked about the books she read, about the new things she learnt and somehow time passed by. Fili looked startled when he felt a hand crawl into his. He looked at the boy and smiled, and gently reached out. He didn’t say anything, he sat back into his lap and rested his head against his chest and inhaled deeply.

“I’m glad you like Daddy Dior.” She gently touched his beautiful hair. The boy reached for her and Fili had both of them back in his arms.

\-------

Bofur’s smile proved their spar was finally on par. They spent most mornings training together, and Fili finally felt alive. Somehow things seemed much better when he had a lot of things to do.

“You’re coming back to your old self.” Bofur smiled happily.

“I feel alive again.” Fili confessed.

“I’m glad.” Bofur threw a towel at him. “Go and shower, you have an important meeting today.”

“A meeting?” Fili was shocked with the news.

“Dior convinced him to find some time for you.” Bofur winked. “Just promise to be nice...”

“I’ll try...” Fili grunted, he wanted the meeting badly, but he wasn’t happy about it at all.


	10. Chapter 10

He found himself waiting a long time, so eventually instead of glaring at the door, he sat at the desk and continued to write. Dwalin was right, writing and reading his memories helped put many things in place. And now it all seemed to fall into place, but there were many questions he still needed answered.

“So it really does help?” The deep voice surprised him. He looked up to see a pair of very apprehensive deep black eyes.

“It does.” Fili grunted unsure what to say.

The omega walked by and sat on the comfortable armchair next to the window.

“You wanted to talk, so let’s talk. I don’t have much time today.” The omega told him firmly.

Fili glared at his speechless. Now that he was there, all the questions were gone, they simply flew away. He was even more beautiful than in his dreams... a bit older, more mature, but so alluring Fili found it hard to breathe.

“I’ve got a few questions...” Fili pulled out the book and opened on the right page. The pages with questions to people.

“Did you teach my eldest to hate me?” He read the first one, but the reaction he got stunned him. The omega bent in half and began laughing like crazy.

“That fucking brat cannot be taught stuff like that... he’s stubborn as a mule and won’t listen to anyone or anything!” The omega continued laughing. “You’d know that if you’d actually take the opportunity to meet him.” The second line was said without laughter, but with a scolding and wit Fili never heard before.

“Do you hate me?” Fili whispered in shock.

“Hate is the wrong word.” The omega hissed.

“So what’s the right one?” Fili asked.

“Pity. I pity you.” The omega told him gently. “You asked for it, but yet what actually happened was not on your own accord.”

Fili glared at him, not sure how to read him at all. The omega’s face was stone cold and emotionless, just like a business partner not willing to show his real emotion.

“Will you let me out?” Fili knew what he really needed to ask.

“Once you stabilize fully and have all of the drug out, and if you act rationally, yes.” The omega’s conditions were rational and sane.

Fili breathed in with relief.

He glanced at the book, questions no one else wanted to answer.

“I want to know... but Bofur and Dwalin won’t answer...” He mumbled.

The omega looked at him curiously. “Yes?”

“How many...” Fili began asking but before he could answer he saw those dark eyes go narrow with rage.

“Now that’s the real problem...” The omega had pure evil on his face. “You still don’t remember.”

“I don’t think I ever knew, so how can I remember?” Fili asked carefully weighing his words, the anger was boiling in him, but he had to remain in control.

He saw a slight flick on the omega’s face, and a gently smile. “That changes a bit... How many do you think?”

“At least four or five?” Fili mumbled.

“I can’t deny that.” The omega still didn’t answer.

“I’d like to get to know them... I’d like to take care of them...” Fili whispered grasping his chance.

“Do you remember how you killed Thorin?” The question made Fili draw breath rapidly in shock.

“I’ve heard about it, but I don’t remember...” He admitted feeling broken, those deep dark eyes seemed to be analysing his every move.

“I can’t blame you for not remembering... the drug did that to your mind... but many hate you for it. Bilbo won’t say it out loud, but your brothers do.” Kili made him realise.

“I remember Merry telling me... he’d kill me...” Fili was suddenly flooded with sorrow.

“He did.” The omega walked up to him and gently wiped his tears. “You really are getting better.”

Fili was suddenly flooded with the scent he wanted so badly. The inexplicable light fragrance he always dreamt about. The omega was so close, and now his heart was pounding like crazy.

Before he could stop himself and think clearly, his lips crashed into his and his arms went around him. He got so lost in the sudden emotion that he just wanted to rip off his clothes and take him yet again...

The omega didn’t protest at all... His spouse did not protest as he was taking off his clothes, taking in the pale smooth skin. Touching the lean thin body...

“I need you...” He whispered gently reaching for his core, his fingers touching the wet silky skin with zeal.

“Then take me...” The omega kissed him fiercely, as if starved.

Fili felt true power as his body melted into him, the wet core taking him deep. This was the omega he wanted... and now that he had him he couldn’t get enough. The sofa was a bit uncomfortable, the floor was cold, but he did not care or mind. The only thing on his mind was pounding him like crazy.

“Will you take my seed?” He whispered to the omega’s ear tenderly. “Will you take it all...”

“Will you take any other omega but me?” The voice was furious and demanding.

“Never...” Fili swore an oath.

“That means from today all of your seed is mine.” The omega hissed back, and pulled him closer, wrapping his arm firmly around Fili’s neck. Fili was shocked with the direct approach, but he had no doubt the omega was moving in accord to his own body. He had no doubt the wet core and arms were proof that the omega wanted him after all...

“Will you come back to me?” He pleaded as the omega began dressing again.

“I will.” The omega kissed him one last time before leaving him alone.

\-------

Fili woke up angry again, so hungry his hands were shaking. He wanted to hit something, kill something, smash a head into the wall and watch the skull crack.

“We need to train more.” Bofur looked at him worried. “What are you feeling?”

“I’m furious...” Fili complained.

“Your eyes are now constantly red.” Bofur made him realise. “We’re entering the most dangerous withdrawal faze.”

“That fucking bitch! This drug is going to drive me insane! Not only did she ruin a huge part of my life, now I’m an unstable monster!” Fili showed everything bothering him. “And I have to be locked in! This is going to be the death of me...”

“Why did all of this happen to me?” He was still raging.

“Bad luck.” Bofur told him calmly. “I’ll call Dwalin to meet us there.”

“Thank you for staying by my side in my darkest days...” Fili held his arm.

“You’re welcome.” Bofur flashed a smile.

\-------

“How are you feeling?” The warm voice surprised him again. He was dead tired, and after his shower he laid back on the bed.

“I’m... unstable.” Fili admitted.

“So has Bofur reported.” He sat down on the bed without fear.

“You’re not afraid of me?” Fili was surprised.

“There are few things you can do, that are worse than those you’ve already done.” The words were bitter.

Fili tried to find anger and hate in those dark eyes, but it was more like his spouse didn’t really care any more.

“Tell me what you feel.” The omega gently reached for his hand, he laid down right next to Fili.

“I feel a lot of things... mainly anger.” Fili confessed.

“Tell me everything...” The omega demanded, and so Fili tried to shape it all into words. Once Fili had no idea what else to say, how to explain it all, the omega dropped the news.

“She’s dead.” He told him slowly. “And from what I heard she died a very brutal and painful death.”

Fili closed his eyes and looked at the ceiling. “I wish I could kill her with my own hands...”

“Had you done that, you would have become just like her. So it’s good that you didn’t. She paid for her crimes, and those who helped her will also have a very bad fate.” The omega made him realise.

“What about the kids?” Fili asked worried.

“They are all safe in the South Wing. They suffered greatly under her rule in the harem, and slowly we’re trying to make them feel and act normal.” The omega explained. “It’s been a very long road with some, but other adapted quickly. We’ve got a group of experienced teachers coming in a few days a week. Bilbo is supervising them.”

“That’s good news... he was always very kind...” Fili mumbled.

“He’s not himself any more, but he’s trying to cope with losing Thorin.” He told him calmly.

“Would you care if I had died?” Fili suddenly asked.

The omega just laughed. “Of course I would! My legal status would change!” He continued laughing.

“That’s it?” Fili demanded dryly.

“I love kids... so well not having you around would mean no more children for me.” He noticed sadly.

“So that’s all I’m good for?” Fili hissed the anger awakening.

“Not sure yet. Once you’re better, we will have to find out what other use you might have.” The omega trembled and Fili saw a flicker of fear in those deep dark eyes.

“You never met the real me.” Fili told him honestly. “I’m not sure there is a real me left inside me...”

“We’ll find you together...” The omega’s warm hand rested on his chest with trust.

“Thank you...” Fili sealed their lips with a tender soft kiss.


	11. Chapter 11

Kili called Bilbo, Frodo, Merry, Dwalin and Bofur for a meeting.

“What is so important?” Merry wasn’t happy.

“We need to talk about him and his situation.” Kili motioned them to sit down.

“There is nothing to talk about, he should be kept locked in.” Merry was grim.

“I understand your anger, but you have to see the big picture. All his actions were due to the drugs he was given. His condition is much better now but he’s not free of the drug yet.” Dwalin spoke up.

“He killed Daddy...” Merry had tears in his eyes.

“The circumstances killed him, the stress killed him, that whore killed him, your brother didn’t play an active role in his death.” Bofur tried to make him see reason.

“We cannot keep him locked up forever.” Kili stood next to the window. “I have already made my decision and I want you all to think about his situation.”

“What have you decided?” Frodo asked him slowly.

“I want to move him to the South Wing, give him a bit more freedom, but still supervised.” Kili told them.

“Has the anger period subsided?” Frodo read the same letters.

“More or less, he’s in control of his temper.” Dwalin assured him. “Just like in those old days.”

“We should let him come here.” Bilbo was calm hearing the news. “If he proves unstable or dangerous, we could always isolate him later.”

“If he does one thing... just one thing...” Merry was very angry.

“We will isolate him again.” Kili assured him.

“Very well then.” Frodo looked at him seriously. “He may move.”

\-------

“Are you ready?” Kili asked him. So far the alpha was calm, his eyes for a longer time the normal blue. But he saw fear in those beautiful eyes.

“I’m not sure...” Fili stood there half paralysed.

“Just take it easy, slowly breathe in and take my hand.” Kili reached out and gently took his shaking fingers.

Together they walked to the South Wing slowly, Kili firmly holding his hand and not letting go. He was confident Dior and Izuna were ready to greet them at the main doorway.

“Daddy!” Izuna did not disappoint, she grabbed him and he lifted her with ease.

“Great to see you again Dior...” Fili gently brushed his beautiful hair.

“Come, you have to see my room!” Izuna pulled him along deep into the South Wing.

Kili walked right behind him, and with a tender smile watched his second born cling to his father.

“Can we go to my room now, Daddy?” Dior suddenly blurred out.

“Of course! Lead the way!” Fili was warm and caring.

“Dinner should be served soon.” Kili told him as Fili walked around Dior’s room full of drawings.

“You’re really talented!” Fili complimented them.

“Dad is even better...” Dior whispered to him.

“Come, I’d like you to meet some of the younger kids...” Kili reached out to him.

\-----

Fili was a bit overwhelmed, but as Kili handed him the infant he felt his hands shaking.

“This is our son, Thorin.” Kili smiled.

“He’s an alpha...” Fili smiled with pride.

“Indeed he is, our second alpha son.” Kili stood there shyly.

“He’s perfect... and he looks a lot like dad.” Fili was proud.

“This is Juna.” Kili handed him the slightly older beta girl.

“She’s not our child.” Fili immediately realised inhaling the scent.

“We have three kids.” Kili told him. “So all the next ones are only yours...” He looked away trying not to show how much it hurt him.

“I’m sorry...” Fili whispered.

“This is Jarar.” He handed him the second infant. “And this is Kenji.”

Fili didn’t say anything, he held each child tenderly and gently traced their faces and hair.

“It’s time for dinner.” Kili took the baby from him and handed it to the trusted servant taking care of the youngest kids.

They walked hand in hand, and Fili was slowly realizing the problem was much deeper and more serious.

“Does he really hate me?” He asked, he didn’t have to say who he was talking about, but Kili knew.

“Yes, it will be a long road not only with him, but your brothers and Bilbo as well.” Kili held his hand strongly. “I’m by your side.”

When they walked in there was immediate silence. The kids remembering their father from the harem showed symptoms of panic, while Izuna and Dior just smiled. The most meaningful was Frer’s reaction, he just glared a silent death threat, and soon Kili realised what strategy their eldest devised, to ignore his own father completely.

“It’s good to see you’re better.” Bilbo came up to him and showed him a seat at the table. “Have you met my younger omega sons? This is Pip, Gror, Fror and Sam.” He introduced his four brothers.

“Sit down please!” Kili guided him to their seats, and soon the servants begun bringing the food.

\-------

“Is it really okay to be among the kids? I wouldn’t want to hurt any of them.” Fili whispered holding his hand tightly as they laid in bed and waited for sleep to take them.

“I trust you. So begin trusting yourself more.” Kili scolded him. “Tomorrow I’m going to have a few meetings, so after your training with Bofur I want you to supervise the kids’ lessons.”

Fili wasn’t convinced at all, but he was going to try for the good of the whole family.

“You’re going to manage just fine.” Kili insisted.

“I’m just scared...” Fili mumbled.

“Of what?” He asked slowly.

“That I might lash out and hurt them.” Fili confessed.

“You are not going to hurt them, you’re in control.” Kili told him firmly. “I trust you not to hurt them.”

Fili wasn’t so sure at all...

\------

Dawn brought even more worries and doubts, but he went to training as planned, later he got cleaned and dressed.

“You’ll manage just fine.” Kili reminded him as he rushed to his duties.

“I’d rather come with you, than face them.” Fili confessed.

“They are your children, you need to learn to love them and they need to learn to respect you.” Kili insisted.

“I’m scared...” Fili confessed again.

“Everything is going to be fine.” Kili pulled him towards the library where the kids were learning. “For now sit back over there, read a book, and watch over them. That’s all I’m asking.”

“Can you do that for me and for them?” Kili asked him more firmly.

“I can...” Fili admitted slowly. On trembling legs he made it to comfortable sofa near the window.

The kids were glaring at him, the older ones with the shy red head were openly glaring. The younger with the other red head tried to hide. Only Izuna and Dior flashed him keen smiles and focused back on their work. With hesitation Fili pulled out a nearby book, and decided not to think about the pressure of being there.

But nothing happened. The kids looked at him from time to time and he could feel their eyes on him. But nothing unexpected happened. The kids were busy and no one wanted anything from him.

“It’s time for lunch!” Izuna rushed to him and pulled him along. So Fili followed.

“Sit down here!” Dior kept two chairs for them. “So what did you think of our lesson?” He asked immediately.

“History is a fascinating subject to study.” Fili was vague, but Dior didn’t mind.

“I prefer biology, plants and animals are more interesting, but history is not bad.” Dior blurred out.

“Izuna told me you wanted to become a medic.” Fili remembered.

“It would be so cool! I could go to train with Arwen or Elrond...” The boy began dreaming. “That is if father lets me... he’s a bit overprotective.”

“Your safety is very important, the world is full of dangers.” Fili shared Kili’s reservations when it came to safety.

“Dad keeps saying the same thing...” Dior looked down dejectedly.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find a way to make your dreams come true.” Fili tried to cheer him up.

“Don’t make false promises.” The deep voice that scolded him was a surprise to everyone at the table. His first born alpha son, so cold and so rejecting.

“I’m going to try to make it possible for both of you to peruse the education you want.” Fili spoke calmly to both Izuna and Dior.

“You’re the best Daddy!” She hugged him eagerly.

The loud ‘ Pfff’ as Frer passed them, made Fili feel they had a huge rift in between.

“Three more hours of classes.” Izuna smiled and eagerly rushed to the library.

Fili simply sat back and listened to their lessons.


	12. Chapter 12

Frer hated him, he utterly hated every minute their father was there. He acted kind, he acted calm, but still Frer hated him. His whole life the alpha never there, abandoning him, his siblings and their omega father. His father pushing through the most unimaginable pain and problems. Kili not only had to raise them, help raise their uncles, but also run the estates, fortune and everything really. From Bilbo’s words he knew what Kili was doing was impossible for anyone else to do. And later the kids... a whole horde of scolded, abandoned kids. Frer was even more angry because of them, his brothers and sisters did not ask themselves into the world, they were bred and left alone for a life of sadness. Dirty, too thin, too scared and lost. And he felt an obligation to protect all of them, even those more irritating ones like Liza and Izuna. They were his family now, and it was his duty to make sure they are safe.

“You’re a lot like your father.” Bilbo’s voice was calm and warm, the praise the highest compliment anyone could tell him.  “But you carry your anger just like Thorin did.”

“He deserves to be hated...” Frer insisted.

“He didn’t deserve what happened to him, just like you and the other kids didn’t deserve a life full of sorrow.” Bilbo gently held him. “He made huge mistakes, but most of them were under the influence of that drug.”

“I cannot forgive him.” Frer bit down on his lower lip.

“You’re just like Thorin.” Bilbo kissed his forehead. “But remember one thing child, anger poisons the soul.”

Frer had no idea how his uncles accepted his presence. He had no idea why his father let him into his chambers and bed. He had no idea how Bilbo could talk about it so calmly.

“You’re becoming a bit too much to handle...” Dwalin brushed his hair in a jokingly matter, when Frer caused another injury to him. It’s not like he wanted to... but he felt just so angry all the time...

“You need to learn to control your anger.” Dwalin told him with a gentle scolding.

“I do not.” Frer hissed.

“So why are you constantly in rage?” Dwalin asked him.

“I hate him...” Frer insisted.

“I know, everyone knows, so does he.” Dwalin made him realise. “You need to learn control.”

“How can I do that?” Frer asked his with his father’s sharp wit.

“Put whatever angers you into reach, and focus on not blowing up.” Dwalin suggested.

Frerin’s brows crossed as he took in the strange words.

\-------

Fili was stunned when his eldest alpha son came close. It wasn’t extremely close, but it was closer than ever before, he sat just a few chairs away with a book. Fili looked up saw red fury in his eyes and he quickly looked back to his book. He talked about it with Kili a lot, and his wise spouse said not to engage the boy at all, to give him time. So despite the temptation to speak up, despite the urge to reach out, Fili tried to focus on the book, but his eyes ventured to the boy sitting nearby.

The next day it was a chair closer. The eyes of the boy were a deep red, and in fact Fili had no idea what his real eye colour was. Apart from the occasional hiss, the boy did not speak to him, but sitting close was a step forward anyway you look at it.

“Daddy would you like to read my story?” Izuna rushed to him with her notebook, and his heir just scowled.

“Of course!” He pulled her into his lap and reached for the notebook.

When he was done, he saw those red eyes glare at him intently, the rage churning in them like a wild fire, but the boy did not say or do anything. But Fili was ready to protect Izuna if he had to.

\-------

“I’d like you to train with him.” Dwalin’s voice was full of something he never heard there before. Just as if his best friend was suddenly very tired. “He’s becoming really strong.”

“Is he constantly in rage?” Fili asked with worry.

“Ever since you showed up here... yes.” Dwalin pointed out.

“That’s unhealthy.” Fili became suddenly very worried. The state of rage should be a temporary jump of emotions in a situation when someone needed to defend. Overextended period of rage were dangerous for the mental health and overall well-being of an alpha. It signalled to everyone uncontrolled emotions, and an unstable character.

“I’m becoming worried.” Dwalin admitted. “He’s just like Thorin.”

“Doesn’t forgive and doesn’t forget...” Fili mumbled.

“Exactly.” Dwalin hissed. “And you’re enemy number one. The first real one.”

“I’m not sure training with him will change anything...” Fili whispered suddenly self conscious.

“Let the emotions drop by letting him beat you to a pulp.” Dwain suggested.

“Is he that strong?” Fili gazed at him.

“He’s extremely strong.” Dwalin warned him. “He’s everything Thorin was, add to that his dad’s intelligence.”

“I could try, if you think it will work.” Fili decided hesitantly.

“Tomorrow six am. He doesn’t sleep much either...” Dwalin swiftly left.

\-------

Frerin had no idea why Dwalin didn’t show up. He was always first at the training ground, usually waiting for him. But when Frer arrived it was empty.

“Are you ready?” The voice of his alpha father almost made him jump and lash out.

“Ready for what?” Frer grunted feeling the anger made him ready to move.

“Dwalin’s not feeling well, so he asked me to step in for your training.” His father explained.

Frerin wanted to hit him, and suddenly he realised he would get a chance...

“First a warm up!” Fili encouraged him to stretch and run a bit, Frer just grunted and followed.

\-------

Fili watched him with great worry, the rage there, the anger clearly visible. But the boy listened, first they warmed up and later they came back to the arena.

“Show me everything Dwalin taught you.” Fili asked trying to be kind, but his instincts were on alert.

The boy took a stance characteristic for their family.

“Let’s begin!” But the moment he said that he regretted it. The boy was everything Dwalin said he was. Extremely strong and agile. The speed of attack, the strength and accurateness of the blows, proved everything Dwalin said was true. The rage made him unstable and uncontrollable, so Fili had to reach deep within himself to defend. The years of laziness took their toll on him, his body still not back to the strength from the past. He would have to... go to rage to match up. The problem was he hadn’t been in rage for years, that damn drug still influencing his emotions.

“You’re not fighting me for real!” The boy suddenly complained. “Why are you holding back?”

“I just can’t go to rage...” Fili admitted. “I’m still not clean from the drug and it prevents going to rage...”

“What?” The boy became even more angry.

“I can’t go into rage.” Fili repeated.

“Like fuck is that possible!” The boy lashed out with even more strength. Now Dwalin’s words made even more sense, he was going to get beat up to a pulp!

Fili suddenly felt helpless and lost, just like when the drug was still active. And when he pushes reached him he didn’t defend. It hurt, it hurt a lot, but somehow he knew he deserved it all. For what he did to Kili, and what he did to the kids.

Then the unexpected happened, suddenly those crimson red eyes became blue and filled with tears. As much as he was angry, the boy was devastated.

“Why are you so indifferent? Why did you do all that to dad and to us?” The boy lashed out. “We didn’t deserve it, dad least of all the people in the world! You don’t deserve to be here with us! You should be just gone!”

“I’m sorry...” Fili whispered and on impulse he reached out. The boy let him, the tight embrace suddenly made Fili know what to do. “I’m really sorry... I wasn’t myself because of the drugs but that’s no excuse. I never wanted to hurt anyone... least of all your father...”

The boy cried in his arms as if the world had ended. “I’m not going to hurt you anymore... I’m never hurting anyone again... I’m going to protect you all from dangerous people.” He gently petted his beautiful golden hair. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there when you grew... I’m so sorry...”

When the boy finally calmed down Fili took his hand and together they walked home. As they were entering Kili was there talking with some servants, and the radiant smile made Fili’s knees go weak. And suddenly he was certain everything was going to be just fine.

The End.


End file.
